


Stolen

by LittleMissSyreid



Category: The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Angst, Asgard, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Sexual Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-24
Packaged: 2018-05-11 09:54:14
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 13
Words: 26,845
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5623156
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LittleMissSyreid/pseuds/LittleMissSyreid
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The reader is unexpectedly transported to Asgard one night, where she is informed that she has been selected as a suitable candidate for Thor's wife. However, when a sleepless night sees her taking refuge in the library, the reader encounters Loki and the couple suffer an undeniable chemistry...</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Stolen

“After a rigorous selection process, you have all been selected for a very prestigious and honoured role.” A man’s voice intruded on your dream.

“You will know my eldest son, Thor,” the name sounded familiar, “and so you will know of his honour, his integrity, and his general excellence. I hope that one day he will succeed me on the throne, and when that day comes he will need a Queen. So you have been selected as the most suitable candidates to fulfil that role.”

“Does… Does Thor know about this?” You couldn’t help but think, tossing in the bed sheets and groaning into the silence of the night. This dream was slowly becoming a nightmare. The voice replied, apparently having heard your question.   
“He… is currently unaware.”   
“Shouldn’t it be his choice? Not yours?”

“Your argument is valid but tradition overrules in this case. The process of selection has been designed to allocate a suitable partner for my son and I will not discuss it any further. You are dismissed and will now be shown to your temporary residencies.”

You sat bolt upright, sweating and cold both at once. You could feel your fingernails digging into the mattress beneath you and it was with that realisation that you remembered where you were.

It had been several days since you’d been brought to the palace and you were beginning to suspect that it would be several more days before you were returned home. Whatever this process was, it was going to take time apparently. You’d fallen asleep one night in your usual bed and woken up in another. A man with an eyepatch watched over you alongside a man with a large gold helmet and pure white eyes. The conversation in your dream… It had been that night. Again.

You tumbled out of bed and past the ‘temporary residencies’ of the other candidates. You didn’t like the idea of being just a name, a number, an entrant in a competition that you did not want to win. Your stomach churned and you tried to remember which way the palace kitchens were, only to end up in the library.

A soft orange glow reaching out from the corner indicated another’s presence in the room and you tried to escape without being heard, only for a silvery voice to call out.

“Lost, are we?” It said. Your eyes searched the shadows and found the owner of the voice. He had long dark hair ghosting the edges of his face and a thin smile that greeted you. It was Loki, brother of your betrothed. He sat in an ornate wooden chair, next to a table and a book in his hands had been lowered to his lap.   
“Not quite.” You replied. “I needed to get away from…”   
“Sleeping?”   
“Something like that.”

Loki hummed and returned to his book. To his left was a lantern that cast a gorgeous amber hue across the walls and it highlighted the various shelves of leather covers that beckoned you. He was quick to act as though you were not there and the feeling was oddly comforting. For the first time somebody expected nothing of you, and the freedom it provided was marvellous.

In a bid to learn from his seemingly relaxed example, you turned to a bookshelf and perused the titles, selecting something that piqued your interest. The backs of Asgardian books did not hold descriptions so you were judging the book by its cover, for once, as you sat down on the floor and peeled apart its pages.

Loki raised an eyebrow over the edge of his book as you began to read, before smiling to himself and returning his focus. After a while, he decided to break the silence.   
“You are one of the fiancées, are you not?” He said, turning a page simultaneously.   
“Potential fiancée. I am just a contender, remember?” You muttered. 

Loki smirked and lowered his book a little. You did not reciprocate, wishing that the conversation was not going so swimmingly. Every word that you spoke with him was a reminder that you were in a whole other realm.

“Something about your tone tells me you are not as thrilled about that as you should be.”   
“Would you be thrilled? Plucked from your home and just thrown into another one…? No,” you sighed, shutting your book, “I don’t think much of being set up with your brother.” You regretted speaking so candidly. This was Odin’s son and Thor’s brother. You should be more respectful, right? Oh well, it wasn’t as if you’d been shown much respect.

“In all my years, I have not heard someone speak so scornfully of that man.”   
“I don’t think much of his dad either.” You said, resting your head in your hand. Loki’s expression became one of amusement.   
“Then that is another thing we have in common.”   
“Another thing?”   
“That book in your hands. It’s a personal favourite of mine.”

You stared at the closed book in your grasp and sighed a smile.   
“I wish I could say I’m enjoying it.”   
“You’re not?” He mused, curiosity lining his voice. Loki slipped out of his seat and elegantly placed himself at your side.   
“Call me dull but there’s something about reading a story on an alien planet, whilst engaged to a God you’ve never met, that sort of kills the story.” His eyes watched you with a twinkle.   
“Beautiful, quirky, amusing, modest, perhaps a little naïve – but never dull.”

With a genuine and appreciative smile, you let your head fall back and closed your eyes. For a moment, just singular little moment, you just wanted to swallow your fear and forget where you were and who you were with. You opened the book and tried to read the first page again. 

For a while you measured the passing of time in the number of pages read. However, that technique only worked so long as you were paying attention and you quickly became so absorbed in the story that you lost count. By the time you looked up again, you’d made your way through half of the book. Loki, on the other hand, had apparently given up reading in favour of watching you. When you met his gaze, you smiled again. He was right. The book was good, if you allowed it to be.

“You should stretch.” He remarked. “You’ve been sat still for a while now.” And he was right again. You placed the book down at your feet and raised your hands to the sky, pushing up your palms and feeling your shoulders click. You then placed your hands behind your back and arched your spine until that too clicked pleasurably. With a sigh you let your head lull forward, strands of hair falling in front of your face. Your neck groaned with relief as you began to roll your head round and round, stretching and feeling your muscles loosen.

Loki seemed mesmerized by the actions.   
“I made the same mistake when I read it.” He smirked. “Where have you stopped?”   
“The dragon has just been released from the castle and is wreaking havoc.”   
“Ah yes. The description of those events falls a bit flat in my opinion.”   
“Mm, maybe, though I liked the line about the flames looking like a serpent, devouring-”   
“-everything in its path. That was rather good, I suppose.”

The conversation between you continued thusly, sharing points of interest and favourite scenes and debating character portrayals. At one point, Loki accidentally spoiled the outcome of a future chapter, causing you to kick him in the shin. He chuckled lowly, seemingly unharmed by it. 

“I do not agree. I think that if he wanted to, Gylfi could have easily protected her.”   
“He barely had time!” You laughed, throwing your head back at the audacity of his suggestion. “He had maybe a second between seeing the threat and doing something about it. How in the hell was he going to-”

Your sentence was cut off as Loki leapt forward and pinned you to the ground by your shoulders. His knees were either side of your hips and his ebony hair tickled your face as he peered down at you. His hands slowly moved from your shoulders to either side of your head so that he was leaning over your form like… well, you didn’t need that image in your head.

The anxiety and shock of your current situation, mixed with a dangerously candid attitude, sent you into a fit of giggles. Loki grinned upon hearing your laugh.   
“See? Perfectly simple. And I hardly have the speed of a warlock.”   
“Okay, I’ll give you that. Maybe he could’ve saved her.” You said, laugh dying into a gentle hum. “You can let me up now.”

“But why should I do that? This is much more fun.” He simpered. “And Gylfi would not have let Svala up so quickly. Not if he had just saved her life.”   
“On the contrary, he’d want to check that she was okay.” You quipped.   
“He’s harbouring feelings that he cannot express and has just saved the life of the woman he loves. He would not pass up this opportunity.”   
“I respectfully disagree. It’s in Gylfi’s nature to-”

Loki seemed to have a habit of cutting you off, if in very different ways each time. He thrust his lips onto yours and stole away your words. A hand slithered under your neck and pulled your mouth onto his own, where his hungry tongue ravished you. His movements were at first slow and lascivious – his body lowered so that you could feel all of his movement against the material of your nightdress – but then he was quickened by his desire until the only sound in the library was of panting, kissing lips, and the friction of clothing.

Against your better judgement, you rose up to meet each of his advances and wrapped your arms around his neck. You forgot everything in that moment and just let yourself be touched, reminded that you were alive. Everything you’d experienced in the last few days had left you numb but this was raw and scorching and you couldn’t ignore it. As your body began to writhe within his grip, you sighed and panted. 

“Mm…. mm…”   
“I know.” Loki murmured, bringing his lips lower and grazing them over your neck.   
“Mm-my… my book.”   
“Can it not wait?”

“No, my book.” You said, “I’m lying on it.”

Loki paused and peered to the left. True to your words, the corner of the leather-bound pages could be seen protruding from underneath you. He looked back into your eyes and saw the amusement twinkling within them. You both burst into nervous and breathy laughter as the reality of the situation sunk in. You had been kissing Loki, and now, after you’d stopped, it seemed so surreal. 

Loki tossed the book aside and then stroked a piece of hair out of your face. He was still on top of you but no longer seemed intent on doing anything about it. He just smiled, and watched you. He laughed softly again before speaking.   
“My apologies. I think-”

“Miss (Y/l/n).” A gruff voice said. You lifted your head but your face fell. Looking over Loki’s shoulder, you saw him: Odin. How long had he been stood there? Loki sighed and rolled off of you, getting to his feet and then helping you to yours. Both of you smoothed out your clothing as the Allfather approached. Neither he or the guards stood some way behind him looked particularly happy. You probably owed an explanation. Or did you? He had hardly given you one since you’d been here… In fact this was perhaps the first time you’d seen Odin since your arrival.   
“I-”  
“Say nothing. You have no words to speak that I could wish to hear.”

“Father, I-”  
“Nor should you speak. You know for what purpose this woman is here, yet you chose to infect her with your wicked mind.”   
“It’s not like that-”  
“Silence!” Odin raised his hands and removed his gaze from Loki. The latter looked severely enraged at being interrupted on multiple occasions.

Instead Odin turned to you.   
“You were selected due to your suitability for this particular role. However, in light of recent events you are relieved of that eligibility.”   
“I… Of course.” You said, not wishing to argue or ask how he had found you for fear that he might rescind his offer. You were going home!  
“You shall be returned to your realm of origin forthwith.”

‘Forthwith’ seemed awfully soon and surprisingly, your stomach was sinking. Wasting no time, Loki took your hand and turned you to him.   
“I will see you again. I will come and find you. I… have rather enjoyed your company.” You bit back a smile and looked down.   
“You’ve known me for less than a day.” Odin frowned and strode towards you.   
“And in that day, I’ve begun to feel-”  
“Heimdall-” You felt a hand on your shoulder and it forced you away from Loki. You stumbled on your feet but managed to remain standing. 

“What? Wait, please-”   
“Heimdall, open the bifrost.” Loki was frantic now.   
“Wait, I don’t even know your name!”  
“It’s-”

There was a flash of light mixed with a shout. And just like that you were gone. Loki stared in disbelief at the space between Odin and he, his mouth hanging open and his eyes wide.   
“She’s… She’s gone…” He panted, hands wanting to reach forward but not having the strength nor courage.   
“She has been returned from whence she came. There is nothing more to be said about-”   
“YOU TOOK HER FROM ME.” Odin stepped back, not having expected the outburst. “THE ONE PIECE OF HAPPINESS I MIGHT HAVE HAD, AND YOU TOOK HER.”

“It was not meant to be. You are a God, my boy, and she is not deserving of you.”   
“NO!” Loki screamed again, his face coloured with rage. “No… I did not deserve her. She was good and interesting; and spoke to me like a person. We might not have deserved each other but that was her choice to make – not mine, and not yours. It was hers. And you took that away. You took her away.

Loki retreated to the corner of the library and turned a few times on the spot. He gave his father one last forlorn look before lowering himself to the floor, stewing in his anger. Odin could see it in his expression. He was trying desperately to scrape together any details he could remember about the girl; any indication of where she might have been from or what she might’ve been called. Any way to locate her again. The guilt about not having asked sooner was eating him alive.

Loki bowed his head. How stupid, how impulsive, had he been? Of course he couldn’t have known he would fall for her but at the same time, he should’ve at least got to know her better. No, that’s not true. He did know her. He knew what her favourite chapter of the book was, her favourite character, what she would do were she faced with a life and death situation, whether she would save herself or a stranger in a split second, and, if she could, what she’d write a novel about. He didn’t know her, but he understood her. And now he couldn’t change that. That chance had both been given to and stolen from him by the man he called father. 

“Loki, I-”  
“LEAVE ME.” Loki spat, lifting his head but not looking at his father. Odin took himself away, feeling more unsure about his decisions than he had ever done before.


	2. Homeward Bound

The last thing you remembered was a shout and a flash of light. Was it yours, or his? Oh, the pain that was ignorance.

Your entire body felt stiff and as you tried to move, you became ever more aware of your surroundings. Wherever you were, it was raining. The sky was crying, weeping, and it poured its icy tears onto your skin, stinging it and forcing you awake. You opened your eyes and promptly shut them again, water threatening to spill into them. _When it rains, it pours…_

You rolled over with a groan, feeling the floor beneath you shift and squelch. Mud caked your back and left it feeling horribly cold. You were still in a nightdress too. Of course. Just your luck. You could feel the rain plastering your hair to your head and the mud did nothing to stop it. You pressed your hands into the soft ground and lifted yourself up to look around. Everything was blurred and melting but it looked familiar. Well, at least there was an upside – you were home. Better your soggy back garden than just a random house on Earth.

You turned your head to the heavens and gazed at the angry clouds. On the other side of them might have been stars, might have been a moon, but the weather seemed intent on reminding you of the heart-wrenching situation you found yourself in. For so long you had railed against staying in Asgard, but now that you were free, you would have given anything to return.

Was this what madness felt like? To be intent on returning to someone that you’d known for less than a day?

You stumbled towards the back door of your house, mud and rain making the soles of your feet unstable as you ambled across the back porch. The shower felt blissful in comparison to the rain, and you lost yourself in the feeling of something inherently normal. As warm suds ran over your face, you shut your eyes and let vivid images steal your focus. You could picture the orange of the lantern, you could smell the leather on the books, and you could taste… You shook your head and tried not to smile too much.

You switched the shower off and wrapped a towel around yourself before approaching the mirror. It was as clouded as your head, and you wished, as you wiped away the condensation, that clearing your thoughts would be as easy as rubbing them away.

The next morning saw the world bathed in sunlight. Dew dripped from the blades of grass and moistened the already saturated ground. You stood on your back porch dressed in a raincoat, an old pair of trousers, and wellingtons, staring at the ground. A strange pattern had been scorched into the ground that looked like a maze, and in the centre of it was the silhouette of where you had woken up. You weren’t mad then… That was somewhat relieving.

You trudged into the mud and collected a hoe from your garden shed. It was old and worn, rust gathering in the crevices – you weren’t an avid gardener – but it would do. You thrust it into the soft ground and began the day’s work, hoping that this was not a sign of insanity. Would you even recognise if it was?

By the time you had finished, the sun was high in the sky. Noon. You stepped back and wiped your forehead with the back of your hand, admiring your handiwork and letting the hoe drop at your feet. _Asgard, I’m waiting._

In retrospect, there were probably a lot of better things you could’ve carved into the mud but your garden was small and you had acted impulsively. It wasn’t as if you could do anything about it now. You didn’t know if Loki would even see it but if there was a chance… You just had to know what he was going to say.

You seated yourself on the fence at the edge of your garden and crossed your legs. The air seemed much colder now that you weren’t working up a sweat and you pulled your jacket a little tighter. You looked up to the skies and hoped that you might see a sign that your message had been received. Was there a time difference between realms? Maybe… Would Loki come down the same way that you had? Was it safe to just be sat there waiting? Would Odin even tell him who you were, or where you had come from?

Thoughts and questions and concerns and a whole other mountain of things crowded your head, making you more and more anxious about your mental state. This is madness, you thought. Madness! So preoccupied with your troubles, were you, that you almost didn’t hear the sound of someone knocking at your front door. Shaking your head and dispersing the voices within, you nimbly hopped through your garden and onto the porch. You kicked off your mud-sodden footwear and gave one last look at your torn up lawn before stepping into the warmth of your house.

The man at your door was sharply dressed and was wearing sunglasses despite the overcast weather. You looked him up and down, forgetting your words for a moment as you drank in his appearance.  
“Ma’am?” He asked, a civility within his voice.  
“Sorry, yes. Hi. Hello.”  
“Hi.” He said, with the ghost of a smile on his face. He pulled a badge from his breast pocket and showed it to you. Thankfully he didn’t just flash the eagle-shaped badge; he let you examine it, lest you be suspicious. “My name is Agent Phil Coulson, and I’m with an organisation called S.H.I.E.L.D.”

“Your name is Agent?” You said, biting your lip and suppressing a smile of your own. You wanted to like him but the suit, shades, and badge was putting you off a little.  
“May I come in?”  
“Why would you want to do that?”  
“I believe you may have something that concerns my department of extra-terrestrial investigations.”  
“I’m not an alien, if that’s what you’re worried about.”

The man looked down at his feet and laughed breathily.  
“We know you’re not an alien. Please, I only want to talk to you about the markings in your garden.” Your mouth fell open and you lost all ability to speak. The shock caused you to fall aside but Agent Phil Coulson saw it as invitation enough. He stepped into the room and wiped his feet before continuing to your back door.

“I won’t stay long,” he said, smiling at you over his shoulder, “I just need to make sure it doesn’t pose a threat.”  
“Would you believe me if I said that I didn’t know what you were talking about?” You mumbled, hurrying after him.  
“Not a chance.”

Agent Phil Coulson stepped onto your porch and folded his arms.  
“You seem… surprised.” You pointed out anxiously.    
“Well, I was expecting markings, but I hadn’t expected you to add to them.”  
“Still believe I’m not an alien?”  
“What you wrote is in English. That’s good enough for me.”

You wanted to laugh but it came out as a sigh of relief. You decided to lean against the doorframe as Agent Phil Coulson began to take photos.  
“Do you want to tell me what happened?”  
“Not particularly.”  
“Didn’t think so. What is this time? That you’re afraid I won’t believe you? Or that you don’t believe it yourself?”  
“You’ve done this before, haven’t you?” You chuckled, trying to ignore how all-too-comfortable you were feeling.

“I find,” Phil said, taking particular care not to make any of his photos blurry, “that a hot drink always makes things a bit easier.”  
“Thanks, but I don’t need calming. And I’m not thirsty.” You folded your arms and avoided Agent Phil Coulson’s gaze as he pocketed his phone and turned around.  
“Who said it was for you?”

* * *

Loki looked around him at the sullen landscape. By Asgard’s standards, this place was practically dull, even if the sky was clear and the sun beaming down upon the world. The soil beneath his feet felt strange and heavy. It looked incredibly dry – the realm must have been experiencing a dry season for some time.

He was stood in a garden, bordered by a fence, but it didn’t look particularly well kept. The grass was yellowish and dying and the ground that it grew from was unsteady, odd peaks and troughs decorating the landscape where they shouldn’t. It was as if someone had been carving up the countryside.

Navigating the maze-like undergrowth, Loki approached the house which he had been informed was your place of residence. It had taken some serious persuading to learn of your heritage from Heimdall – the guardian seemed reluctant to part with the information despite the fact that Loki had assured him it was no act of treason. The worst case scenario saw Loki getting a stern reprimanding from Odin regarding his impulsive and selfish decision, as was usually the case, followed by celebrations. Ever since that day, he’d been unable to get you out of his head and he didn’t need to be told twice what that meant. Loki had wasted a worrying amount of time attempting to learn of your location, and he just hoped that he wasn’t too late.  

So you can imagine his elation upon seeing you again in the window of the house. You looked better than ever in the daylight of Midgard (as opposed to the dim lamplight of an Asgardian library). You placed a few pieces of crockery into the kitchen sink and a strand of hair fell over your eyes. You attempted to blow it out of the way but to no avail, causing you to pout in frustration. Loki smirked at your quirkiness; he’d seen you for barely a minute and already felt that he knew you better! He wished that he could appear at your side and stroke your hair back. What an amusing shock that would be for you! And then you would embrace him and he could whisk you back to Asgard and-

A man appeared at your side in a shirt and tie. He brushed the hair out of your face tenderly before stealing a kiss on your cheek and making you smile. He was about the same height as you and wore a thin smile upon his face. If Loki’s elation at seeing you again had been great, his dismay at the sight before him now was even greater.

You appeared to be talking to the man quite vehemently as you continued cleaning the dishes, even laughing at one point – though whether it was at something the suited man had said or whether it was at one of your own jokes, Loki couldn’t tell. He didn’t know what was worse. You smiled at the man and Loki felt his stomach sink. You had smiled at him like that once.

The man pulled on a blazer and kissed you once more before leaving the room. There was the sound of a door opening and closing and Loki could hear the man humming to himself as he left the house, got into a car, and drove away.

You were scrubbing furiously at the dishes now, seemingly becoming more and more irritated with the stubborn stains. Another piece of hair fell in front of your face and Loki smiled sadly. He gestured with his hand and a small emerald cloud pushed the strand behind your ear again without drawing your focus. You were too intent on the task at hand.

Loki ground his jaw for a moment before sighing and letting his head drop. He turned around and spoke to the sky, voice coarse and threatening to break.  
“Heimdall? Open the bifrost. I am returning. Alone.”


	3. Reunited

“Agent Phil Coulson, I swear if you leave the window open one more time-”  
“Woah, using my _full_ name? I’m in trouble.”

Phil stepped into the room and flashed a sleepy grin. He’d only just woken up and his night clothes were ruffled to the high-heavens. He scratched the back of his neck and padded softly across the kitchen to where you were pouring coffee. You were a light sleeper and the sound of a bird chipping away at the window pane had disturbed your slumber.   
“As long as I’m paying the bills, you need to stop letting the heat out.” You smirked, trying to stay firm as he wrapped his arms around you and rested his chin on your shoulder.   
“I’m sorry. I guess I just prefer it cooler.”

“Nothing I can do about that I’m afraid.”   
“It seems you’re coping okay. What’s with the jumper?” Phil said, stepping away and making some coffee for himself. You seated yourself nimbly upon  the countertop and waited for your drink to cool down.   
“What do you mean ‘what’s with the jumper’?” You laughed.   
“Well, it’s clearly far too big for you?”

“That’s the point.”   
“Whatever you say.” He smiled, raising his own mug to his lips.   
“Don’t you have work to get ready for or something?” You said, kicking him gently with your foot.

“I got time. I needed to talk to you anyway.”   
“Oh, that doesn’t sound ominous at all.”   
“I’m serious.” He said, stepping towards you. “I just wanted to let you know that I’m going away for a while. I can’t tell you a lot – or anything really – but basically SHIELD is trying out a new initiative and they want me on board.”

You nodded after a brief pause, failing to keep your smile reassuring.   
“I won’t be gone long.” Phil assured you.   
“No, I know,” you said, hopping back onto the kitchen floor, “you never are. And I want to be happy that you’re getting all these amazing experiences, but it doesn’t change the fact that I’m going to miss you.”

Phil pulled you into a hug and rubbed your back.   
“I’ll miss you too. But look at it this way, nobody will leave the windows open whilst I’m gone.”   
“I think I can live with that.”

* * *

The guard dropped to the floor with a crash and Loki looked up from the control panel.   
“Move away, please,” said the man who was responsible for the disruption. Loki paused, unable to believe his eyes. He stepped back, keeping his hands bared and visible, as the man in the suit stepped closer.

 _The man in the suit._ It was he who had been there on that fateful day, the day that Loki had not thought about in years. The day when he’d ventured to Midgard in pursuit of the woman who’d stolen his heart… Now, after denying him one happiness, this foolish man had the audacity to tamper with his plans for a second time, the nerve to point a gun at him as if there was the slightest chance that he might win this combat. _Not again_ , Loki thought. _You may have won the battle, but the war is mine_.  

“You like this?” The man asked, “Started working on the prototype after you sent The Destroyer. Even I don’t know what it does…” This man’s arrogance was unparalleled, Loki found himself thinking as the gun buzzed into life. “You wanna find out?”

Loki didn’t think in that moment – he just did. The arrogance, the complacency; it was all too much. It was like he was gloating. In a fit of rage, Loki saw only red and plunged his sceptre into the man’s back. His back arched, and the man in the suit crumpled to the floor.

Thor screamed from within his prison and flung himself against the glass. He’d never looked more helpless. Loki smirked as he strutted back to the control panel, gesturing to his sceptre at the same time. It was finally _his_ time to gloat. After barely a moment’s hesitation, the cage sunk from sight and barrelled into the air below. Loki rolled his shoulders before making to leave.

“You’re going to lose…” A voice croaked. The God stopped, turned, and leered. He was feeling extremely proud of himself and nothing could change that. Not even the taunts of a man who simply refused to die.   
“Am I?”   
“It’s in your nature.”   
“Your heroes are scattered. Your floating fortress falls from the sky. Where is my disadvantage?” The man paused, seemingly for effect.   
“You lack conviction.”

Loki kneeled next to the dying man.   
“(Y/n) would disagree.” He replied, a sadistic grin creeping onto his features. The man’s eyes widened and he grunted as he tried to move. Blood continued to creep out of his mouth.   
“That’s… That’s not p-possible…”  
“It is entirely possible. We met what must be a long time ago for you, upon Asgard, and shared the sweetest of moments. Such a shame that you’ve decided to abandon her.”  
“You stay away from her.” The man in the bloodied suit growled. Loki could see the desire to fight in his eyes. But that was dying as quickly as he was.   
“I don’t think-”

The gun exploded into his abdomen and sent Loki flying into a nearby wall. Agent Phil Coulson could see the God’s debris-covered form shuffling and moaned in pain. Still alive. He leant his head back against the wall and tried to focus on breathing. He needed to stay alive too; at least long enough to… to…

* * *

The knock on the door was fierce and abrupt. You muted the television, where pictures of the Avengers burned into your screen, and peered through the curtains. A sleek black car sat outside, the owner of which was hidden from your view but continued to knock at the front door. Eventually you were forced to open it.

The experience was all too familiar. A man in a suit and sunglasses waited at your door. A sick feeling resided in your stomach. You were shown a badge in the shape of an eagle too. You didn’t like it. Something was wrong about it. The man introduced himself curtly and handed you a letter. He then nodded his head and returned to his car. You lowered yourself back onto the sofa in front of the television and pored over the paper. As you read further and further in you could feel a heat rising to your eyes.

_Agent Phil Coulson… an exemplary agent… killed in combat… died with honour…_

You wanted to scream. You wanted to cry. You wanted to throw up. Every emotion that it was possible to feel was forced into your throat and obstructed your breaths. This was impossible… He was on a trip. He was supposed to come back, to come home.

You didn’t sleep that night. The bed felt uncharacteristically empty and cold. You tossed and turned and at 3 in the morning, you stood up and abandoned your attempts to sleep. Futile.  

You boiled the kettle like normal but were painfully aware of the fact that you would only be making one cup. You mindlessly moved the sugar around the mug with a spoon whilst waiting for the click of the kettle.

A flash of light outside caught your attention and you peered out of the kitchen window. At first you thought the night looked as empty as you felt – but then you saw it. Saw him. There was someone stood in your back garden. He was tall and lean, and his eyes twinkled in the moonlight. Twinkled with mischief…

Loki wrung his hands together and gazed back at you, desperate to know what you were thinking. The gaze you shared was equally electric and suffocating. Neither of you moved and yet both of you wanted to. To acknowledge the other’s presence.

After a moment you scrambled out of sight and Loki was left to stare at blank glass. He wondered whether to follow you, whether this had even been a good idea. As he contemplated leaving, the back door swung open and revealed you to him. You stood in the doorway with a blanket around your shoulders, staring out into the early morning darkness. Again you didn’t move. It was like you were in shock.  

Loki edged closer to you, navigating the garden once more, and stepped onto the porch. Hesitation ladened his every step. This was the moment he’d been denied. He looked down at you, unable to believe that he was this close to you once again. To him it seemed like yesterday that your bodies had been intertwined. He could see your breath leaping free of your mouth in short sharp bursts, reaching out to him in clouds of grey. A strand of hair concealed your eye and Loki lifted a finger to tentatively brush it behind your ear.

Tears prickled your eyes and you threw your arms around his waist, burying your face into his torso. Loki was caught off guard and for a moment did nothing in response. Your grip, however, never wavered and ultimately Loki snaked his arms around you to hold you close.

You shared what would’ve been a dismal morning with company that you hadn’t expected but realised that you needed


	4. Hidden Traitors and Friends in Plain Sight

Loki felt far too big in your quaint kitchen. The floor was made of large mottled brown tiles and was bordered with oak cabinets and cupboards and drawers. On top of one counter was a sink that was piled high with dishes, above which was a small, panelled window through which the moon shone. He lowered himself into the dining room chair and leaned back in it. Despite how surreal it felt, he knew that he deserved to be there. It was about time.

You looked emotional and shaky as you shut the back door. You shuffled into the room and poured yourself the hot drink you’d been craving.   
“Do you want tea or something…?”  
“Thank you, no.” Loki sighed, folding his arms and watching you. Somehow you weren’t as happy as he had expected you to be.

When you turned around and sat, you placed yourself on the other side of the table. Why so distant? Loki found himself thinking. You ran your finger around the rim of the mug mindlessly, neither speaking to or looking at him.  
“I’m very happy to see you.” Loki said, leaning forward. You still did not look up.   
“I’m… I’m…”

Loki hurried to your side as your head lulled and tears spilled from your eyes. He kneeled by your chair and pulled you into his lap, stroking your head and pressing his lips on to the top of your head. He hushed you and held you close. You buried your face into his chest and let your anxieties pour out. 

“My darling woman, what troubles you? Tell me what is wrong.”   
“He… He… He’s…”  
“Who, my sweet?”  
“Ph-Phil… He’s dead.”

“Who was Phil?”  
“I… I think I… I loved him.” You wept. Loki’s hands froze despite the fact that you still clung to him. His eyes stared forward unseeing and enraged. Even though he was dead… He was still in the way. Slowly he resumed consoling you though his thoughts buzzed in his skull.

* * *

Steve Rogers knocked on the door and placed his arms behind his back. He cleared his throat and looked down at his feet. He was nervous to say the least. The door opened slowly and a very tired looking woman glanced at him. A blanket was around her shoulders and her hair was incredibly messy.   
“Sorry,” she croaked, “but I’m.. I’m not taking visitors right now… Sorry…”

By the end of her sentence her words had become a mumble. The woman moved to close the door but Steve placed his hand gently against the wood.   
“I don’t mean to intrude,” said he, “but I recently heard about Phil. Mr Coulson. And I was wondering if we might talk.”

The woman’s eyes widened and she stepped in his direction, rubbing her eyes.   
“You knew him?”   
“Not well. But I’m pretty sure I owe him my life.” Upon stepping into the sunshine, the woman blinked and looked him up and down.   
“You’re… You’re Captain America.”  
“I am.”  
“He really loved you, you know. I’ve still got one of his posters of you.”

Steve smiled bashfully and looked down, kicking the ground tentatively. He suddenly remembered something and reached inside his jacket pocket.   
“I, um, I’ve got these, if you want them. He had them in his jacket when he… Well, he had them on him.”

Steve handed her the collecting cards and winced when he saw the blood that stained them. The woman, however, didn’t seem to care, taking them into her hands and smiling wistfully. She looked up at him and stepped aside.   
“Would you like to come in?”  
“Do you mind? It’s like I said, I don’t mean to intrude.”   
“Not at all. A friend of mine is about somewhere but it looks like he’s not around at the minute.”

Steve followed you inside and you suddenly felt incredibly self-conscious about the state of your home.   
“It’s- it’s a little cold in here. Are you okay?”   
“Hm? Oh, right yeah.” You padded into the kitchen and shut all of the windows that you’d opened. “Sorry. I guess I just… prefer it cooler at the minute.”

After offering him food and drink, you took a seat at the dining table. Steve had accepted a glass of water and sipped at it nervously.   
“I feel like I should ask you how you know him.” You murmured, having lost all the energy to talk. You were still a little groggy from the nap you didn’t remember taking. Loki, whenever he left, had covered you with the blanket that currently presided on your shoulders.

“I don’t think I’m allowed to say a lot.” Steve muttered, his voice guilt-ridden. He scratched his neck and cast his eyes low.   
“Most of it’s on the news…” You mumbled, remembering the scenes of destruction you’d watched on the television. You didn’t want to picture Phil amongst that… It hurt too much.   
“I suppose it is. Well then; Phil was assigned to the Avengers Initiative and he kept us all together. But I… I guess I should’ve known him a little better than the others. He was there when I was thawed out.”

You nodded and nursed your own drink, appreciating that you could talk about Phil as though he was still here. Still going to walk through the door any minute.   
“I imagine that you have a lot of questions about how he… _You know_.” You nodded again and looked away. Steve continued. “I don’t have all the answers unfortunately – I wish I did.”   
“I didn’t expect you to. It’s alright. I appreciate you coming at all.”

Steve pulled a notebook from his breast pocket and scribbled on it as he spoke.   
“But… I’ll give you… my details… and a couple of others’…” He ripped the paper out and slid it across the table to you. “Just in case you want to chat. Maybe they can answer some of the things that I can’t.”

You examined the paper. Alongside Steve’s number were two others, annotated with surnames; _Stark_ and _Barton._ Were these…?

“You don’t have to use them, but they might come in handy.” His face suddenly fell. “And if you’re ever in a jam, then feel free to use them then too. Phil wanted to keep you safe, he asked that much of Fury, and that’s what I intend to do – in any way I can. You need me; you call me.”   
“Mr Rogers-”  
“Steve, please. Mr Rogers was my father.” He grinned.

“Steve… I- Thank you.”   
“Not at all.” He smiled at you. A real smile. A _good_ smile. Your stomach twisted as your cruel mind showed you Phil’s smile, and the last time you had seen it. Your arms had been around his neck as you kissed his cheek. You had wished him well at work and held onto him a little longer than you ought, still hesitant about letting him leave. You treasured the memory of those precious extra seconds.

Steve covered your hand with his and brought you back to reality.   
“Everyone wishes they could’ve done something else. You will always have regrets. Always. But you can’t let ‘em drag you down. Hold onto the good things, and you’ll forget everything else. I promise.”

You nodded and pulled your hand away from Steve’s. As reassuring as it was, your mind would only find a way to torture you with it. With a solemn nod, he stood.   
“Well, I won’t outstay my welcome.” He said, taking his cup to the sink and rinsing it out. You watched him with tired eyes and felt yourself nodding. Steve noticed as much as he turned and placed a hand on your shoulder. “Don’t exhaust yourself, okay? You need rest, good food, and some time to heal. Do you have any family that you can call?”

You shook your head and made to stand.   
“I can see myself out.” He smiled sympathetically. “You’re going to be grieving, though, and you shouldn’t be alone.”   
“I won’t be alone…” You said, thinking of Loki, and the way he had taken you into his arms as if nothing had changed in all the time that you hadn’t seen him.   
“Well, good. I’m glad. But if you need someone and you _are_ alone, don’t be afraid to call. You hear?”   
“I hear you Cap.”

Steve chuckled. After patting your shoulder, he disappeared from your tired and hazy sight. The abrupt bang of the closing front door told you he was gone. You shuffled to the sofa and collapsed upon it, trying to ignore the stinging from your eyes as you closed them.


	5. A House Divided

You dove in and out of sleep that night. Steve had left hours ago and despite your exhaustion, you just couldn’t relax. The blanket over your shoulders did more harm than good, and eventually you had tossed it onto the floor. You were completely out of it and sleep was further away than it had ever seemed.

Sitting up, you rubbed your eyes and looked around your darkened home. Was it too late for a drink? You stood up and yawned, trying not to nod off now that you had decided to abandon the idea. The kettle had never boiled slower and you were pretty sure that you yawned another 42 times in the same space of time.

A flash outside lit up your kitchen momentarily and you turned around. Loki was strutting through your garden, towards the back door. His face was darkened in the moonlight and if you didn’t know any better, you’d think he looked terrifying.

Once inside, Loki was surprised to see you pottering about the kitchen in the dark.   
“You’re awake.” He said, though it sounded more like a statement than a question.   
“Couldn’t sleep. Where did you get to?”

“I… couldn’t stay. Did you miss me?” He said. You didn’t want to answer that question. There was only one person you missed right now – and you didn’t have the heart to tell Loki how it was _not_ him. He frowned.   
“Yes, I noticed that you had company.”

“Captain America heard what happened to Phil.” Loki’s face suddenly dropped. He stepped forward abruptly, catching you a little off guard.   
“And what did he tell you?”   
“He… He didn’t tell me anything, so much as listen to me. He just wanted to make sure that I was okay.”

“How… thoughtful. Though I shouldn’t think anything of it.” The kettle clicked and you poured yourself a hot drink.   
“Shouldn’t I?”   
“My darling, I am here for you. You need no-one else.”

Your eyes darted to the piece of paper that was on the dining table; the one Captain America had given you. Loki followed your gaze and picked up the piece of paper.   
“He gave it to me in case of emergency. I’m supposed to call him if I need anything.”

Loki crumpled up the paper, tossed it into the empty sink, and took you into his arms. Something about his embrace felt stiff and you couldn’t help but be concerned as to why he had discarded your means of support.   
“My dearest woman. If you need anything, I am yours. Devotedly. I did not come all of this way to have you shared with another.”

“I know.” You sighed, placing a hand on Loki’s cheek. “And I appreciate what it must have taken to find me but… I need time. And Steve knew him. It would’ve been nice to talk…”   
“If it is talking that you wish for, I will not abandon you again. Believe me when I say that time can make things worse. My separation from you proved as much to me, and I shan’t let you go through that like I did. I appreciate that Captain Rogers has offered his services but they are not necessary. Do not doubt me, my love.”

“I don’t doubt you…” You stammered. _My love?_ Did he seriously think…? Everything was moving too fast and you felt your breath thickening. Loki was clearly still under the impression that you felt how you used to – and currently that was not the case. You needed to make it clear that Phil had since taken precedence in your heart. Though maybe one day you could move on, now was no such time.

You stepped back and presented him a thin smile.   
“I don’t doubt you, but this is all incredibly overwhelming.”   
“I understand. Whatever you desire.”   
“Right now, I desire to know something. How long do you think it’s been since I’ve seen you?”

“I cannot say. Time moves too quickly in this world and yet every day that I was parted from you felt like a one too many.”   
“That’s not an answer. Do you seriously not know?” Loki looked uncomfortable. Apparently being ignorant of information was not a feeling he was accustomed to.   
“I… I do not.” You chewed your lip and looked down at the floor. You suspected as much. With a deep breath, you began.

“I appreciate you coming back for me, to rekindle whatever we had. But I haven’t seen you in 3 years,” Loki’s face became incredulous, “and I spent 2 of those in love with Phil.  Whatever we felt back then, it’s going to take a lot longer than a couple of days to… revive. I don’t know what you were hoping for-”

Loki shook his head.   
“I only have one hope, and that is to have you in my arms once more. Like the moment we shared on Asgard.”   
“And maybe that’s a possibility – but not now. Not now.”

Loki smiled reassuringly and placed his hands on your shoulders.   
“I will be here. Whenever. I shall not risk leaving you again.”

You wrapped your arms around Loki and rested your cheek on his torso. You could feel tears welling in your eyes as his arms fell around you too. The pair of you shared a hot drink before settling onto the sofa once more. With your head in Loki’s lap, and his hand stroking your face, sleep came a little more naturally.

* * *

 

You hadn’t slept in your bed for a week. The sofa was your new favourite place, blankets and pillows having been moved there to accommodate the change. Your television was permanently off unless you decided to watch a film. The cupboards were bare, the house was a mess, and you still didn’t have the energy to do anything.

Nonetheless, Loki remained by your side. As you lay on the sofa, he took your head into his lap and stroked your hair. Every now and then he would mumble something, though his mood seemed changeable.   
“Isn’t this better? Now we are together?”   
“I do not see how this house is suitable for you. A queen deserves a palace.”   
“I wish we hadn’t lost so much time.”

You woke up, one morning, with your body across his. For once his eyes were shut and you noted that it was the first time you had seen Loki sleeping; he looked so peaceful. His face was calm and smooth, no harsh lines crossing it, and his chest rose and fell softly.

You did your best to stand up without disturbing him, just as a soft knock came from the front door. Placing a blanket over Loki, you moved to answer it. Steve Rogers beamed when the door opened.   
“Oh good,” He sighed, “I was worried that something might be wrong.”   
“I… Thanks.” You laughed softly. “Although I wonder that I should be offended.”

“Sorry, no, I just…” Steve scratched the back of his neck, “Call me self-centred, but I thought you might have called me at some point. I wanted to check that you were coping alright.”   
“I’m fine. I actually lost your number.” You smiled apologetically. “But I still have that friend I mentioned.”

“Well, I’m glad to hear it.”   
“Would you like to come in?” You blurted out. “I mean, I just woke up and it’s a bit of a tip but-”  
“I’d love to.” Steve smiled warmly.

You stepped aside and, once again, he wiped his feet on the doormat. He flashed you another smile as he walked inside, as if reminding you that he didn’t care about the state of your home.

However, when he turned around, his face fell immediately. Not only did it fall, it seemed to drop. Plummet. Hurtle to the ground. He didn’t just look surprised – he looked terrified. Steve suddenly turned and covered your mouth. Using his free hand, he brought a finger to his lips.

“We need to leave.” He whispered. You could feel his pulse racing on the edge of his fingertips. “I have a motorbike outside and I can take you back to the Avengers Tower. You’ll be safe there.” You attempted to mumble a response but he shook his head and glanced nervously at the sleeping Asgardian on your sofa.   
“How long has he been there? Has he threatened you, or hurt you? Did he tell you what he wanted?”

Steve removed his hands to let you whisper a response.   
“What are you on about? He’s my friend.”

You didn’t think it possible for his eyes to get any wider – but they did.   
“Miss (Y/l/n)… He’s… Well, he’s… Do you know who he is?”   
“He’s Loki.” You said, looking between the two men before continuing. “I mean, I know it’s a _bit_ strange having an Asgardian staying with me, but you’ve got Thor on your team.” Steve placed his hands on your shoulders and dropped his head.   
“(Y/n), this isn’t like us having Thor on our team. That’s not what I meant when I asked if you knew him. I meant, do you know what he’s done?”

“Captain Rogers, you’re not making any sense.”   
“It doesn’t matter. I can explain later – but right now we need to go.”

Steve’s hands lowered and took your wrists. He attempted to lead you out of the door but you resisted – firstly because you were not appropriately dressed for gallivanting around the city, and secondly because you were thoroughly and dangerously confused.   
“I’m not going anywhere with you until you explain!”

As Steve attempted to lead you away quietly, you only became more exasperated. Despite his hushing you, your voice grew louder. And Loki was awoken.

Immediately Loki threw himself between you and held his arms wide, shielding you from Steve and staring him down.   
“I suggest that you leave, _Captain_.” He hissed, though Steve showed no signs of doing so.   
“Miss (Y/l/n)… Please. He’s not safe.”   
“What are you talking about? What could he possibly have done?” You called out. In an attempt to calm the situation, you placed a hand on Loki’s shoulder. He shrugged it away and continued his fierce stand-off with Steve.

“You must’ve seen the news… The devastation… The destruction.”   
“All I saw was the Avengers. That’s all the news ever showed me. Then I lost Phil and suddenly I didn’t want to look at it anymore.”   
“(Y/n), please. He-”  
“Do not say another word or I shall skewer you where you stand.”

“Loki…” you murmured. In the last 30 seconds, he had changed a lot.   
“You’ll stab me, will you?” Steve said, anger fuelling his voice. It was practically shaking with rage. “ _You’ll stab me like you did Phil Coulson?_ ”

The words didn’t quite sink in at first. But as they did, your jaw quivered and lowered. You stepped (stumbled would be a better word) away from Loki and reached out your hands for anything to grab onto. You shook your head a couple of times and tried to focus on breathing but everything was dizzying. A pair of hands rested on your shoulders and steadied you. Looking up, a pair of baby-blues returned your gaze. Steve let you lean against him whilst Loki watched you with his hands outstretched, as if he could still catch you if you fell.

As if there was a chance you’d come back to him.

“I’m sorry,” Steve whispered, “but, it was all him. He brainwashed Clint, destroyed New York, and Phil…”   
“You… You…” You panted. Loki momentarily ripped his eyes away from yours to glare at Steve.    
“Do not believe a word this man says. He knows nothing.” 

“Just give me a reason, Loki, give me a reason. I’m only holding back because-”   
“Shut up the pair of you.” You yelled. “Loki, did you attack New York?”

Loki hesitated, chewing over his words.   
“Attack suggests that I was an antagonist. But-”  
“ _Did you attack New York?!”_ Loki hesitated again.

“I did.”

“And Phil…” Your voice was weak and thin. “Did you kill him?”   
“In my defence, the first time I saw you together-”  
“The first time?” You whimpered. “You mean you… You came back and…”

You took a minute to gather your thoughts and your courage, placing a hand to your head as if it might calm down the business within.   
“I intended to contact you-”  
“No more lies, Loki.” You snapped. Loki drew back for a moment. You utilised the opportunity to regain your nerve. Every word from here on out would get you answers. “Cards on the table - did you kill him?” 

“I did.” 

“Why?”   
“He was… He was in my way.”   
“No shit! The _truth_ , Loki. In what sense was he in your way?” You growled, voice trembling. You knew the answer, but you had to hear it. You had to know. Loki turned to the side and placed his tongue in his cheek.   
“I… Whilst he was with you, I… could not be.”

“So this… All this wasn’t… It wasn’t you being kind or compassionate, or actually caring about me-”  
“(Y/n), I-”  
“Shut up!” You cried. Tears were distorting your vision but you didn’t care anymore. “This was all a means to an end. A point to prove. This was never love. This was lust. You only wanted me because you couldn’t have me. Because you came back and I’d fallen for someone else. You were bitter, and resentful, and you took that out on him.”

Loki said nothing, grinding his teeth and staring at you with his eyebrows low.   
"Well, you should’ve taken it out on me. I fell for him too, remember? All of my heartache, all of my grieving – you witnessed it all and you still didn’t figure that out. It was as much my fault as it was his. And do you wanna know how I know that?” You paused, licking your lips. You could feel your upset being replaced with anger. “Because you failed. You got rid of him, you took him out of the picture, and you still failed. You thought you were being clever but it’s come back to bite you in the ass. You took him away from me, and I will  _never_  forgive you for that. You’ve failed, Loki. Just accept that, and nobody else will get hurt.”

Your fists were shaking by the time you’d finished and it was only when Steve covered one of them with his own hand that you remembered where you were. Loki still did not speak. You turned your heavy head and looked up at Steve.   
“I need your help.”   
“And you have it.” He replied. “I made you a promise.”

You could feel Loki’s eyes boring into you as the motorcycle sped away and you knew it wouldn’t be the last you saw of him. But you reminded yourself to be strong. You’d been kidnapped, engaged to a stranger, fallen for his brother instead, and banished back home where you fell for a different man – a good man – who your former lover then murdered.

You were nothing if not prepared to be strong.


	6. Two of Earth's Mightiest

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Coursework levels have risen recently, hence why it took me so long to get this chapter out. It's not even particularly exciting or long so I apologise for that. But after work this weekend I'll work on it a bit more. Until then, enjoy. :)

The Avengers Tower looked like a train wreck. There was construction equipment and scaffolding everywhere. Windows were blown out, things were falling off everywhere, and, every now and then, sparks would fly off of the side.   
“You live here?” You asked as Steve helped you clamber off of his motorcycle. You were dressed in what you’d woken up in – sweats and an oversized shirt.

He chuckled.   
“No, I don’t live here but you will. It’s safe here.”   
“That’s… but I thought I was going to stay with you.”   
“I’ll be around. I told you I was going to help you, didn’t I? I just won’t be the only one.” He smiled and took your hand, leading you inside.

The interior looked no better than the outside. There were canvases and sheets and building supplies everywhere. Yet no workmen or anyone doing anything with it. A flashing light in the distance and a buzzing sound told you that someone was there, working, despite the lack of crewmen.   
“Rogers?” The hidden man called out.   
“Yeah, it’s me.”

“Good. Hand me that wrench over there.” With a roll of his eyes, Steve left your side and obliged, crossing the room and delivering the tool to whoever was asking. A series of boxes concealed him from you. Despite the racket the working man made, you could still hear the two men’s conversation.   
“What was it doing all the way over there?”   
“I got frustrated.”   
“And… you couldn’t pick it up yourself?”   
“I asked you to a few minutes ago actually. You sure took your time.”

“Tony, I left half an hour ago. I even told you that I was leaving!”   
“Did you? I didn’t notice. Explains a lot…”

You cleared your throat to remind both men that you were still listening and Steve’s focus seemed to return. His head appeared from behind the boxes and he bared his hands reassuringly before disappearing again.   
“Tony, you remember that woman I told you about?”   
“Hm?”   
“The one I gave your number to?”   
“Who the hell have you been giving my number to?!”   
“Tony, I need you to focus. The woman I mentioned… Phil’s other half?”

A dark-haired man poked his head around the boxes, significantly closer to the floor than Steve as a result of the mechanic’s creeper he was scooting about on. When he saw you, his face relaxed and he stood up, dusting his hands on his jeans.   
“I remember now…” He murmured as he approached you. Tony Stark stopped in front of you and took your hands. He was wearing a large flannel shirt over a vest, and he smelled of dust and aftershave.

“I am _so_ sorry about what happened.” He said with a solemn grin, giving your hands a quick squeeze.   
“Yes, I’m hearing that a lot…” You mumbled.   
“Oh, sorry. Would you… Do you want something to drink?”

“Tony!” Steve snapped.   
“Sorry, sorry, I just… She just didn’t want pity so I-”  
“Thank you Mister Stark.” You said, the ghost of a laugh gracing your lips.

After the initial introductions, Mister Stark showed you upstairs. No matter how many times he insisted that you call him ‘Tony’, you couldn’t. It wouldn’t feel right. Steve was no longer with you but before he had left, he’d explained everything to Tony. Where you had expected cynicism from the billionaire, you received only sympathy. You couldn’t tell if you liked that feeling or not.   
“I can’t say he won’t get to you here, but I’d like to see him try. If we’re being realistic he’ll definitely try. But I imagine that once we tell Barton, SHIELD will find a way to contact Thor.”  
“Okay then.” Tony was speaking far too calmly for you. He was talking about summoning the Norse God of lightning and he spoke like he was discussing the latest football score.   
“He won’t be too happy though. He thought he’d arrested Loki, taken him back to Asgard. If he was angry before… Man, I don’t want to be here when he arrives.”  
“So, he deceived Thor too?”

“It certainly seems that way. Everybody thought we were done – that he was gone, that the battle was over – but by the sounds of it, Loki just scampered into hiding.” Tony let you exit the elevator first and the higher floors didn’t seem to be in a much better state. “A few floors were immediately salvageable like the residential floor, the kitchens, and the labs, but everything else looks like shit. When I imagined meeting Coulson’s missus, I didn’t picture my place being such a tip.”   
“Don’t worry. I’m still getting over the fact that you have multiple kitchens. And a whole floor for bedrooms.” You replied with a nervous smile. Tony laughed.

The elevator doors opened up onto a room with glass comprising practically every wall. There were even shards of it on the floor, presumably still not having been cleaned up from the Battle of New York. A man with dirty blonde hair was peering over the edge of the floor, out of one of the broken windows.   
“At least make it more of a challenge for me to off you,” Tony joked.   
“I’d be surprised you could do anything without your suit,” the man replied, turning around and stepping away from the sickening drop to certain death.  For two people who just finished fighting a war against aliens, they were surprisingly chipper.

“I want you to meet someone. This is the gal that Steve was telling us about. Clint Barton, meet-”  
“You must be (Y/n),” Barton said, pulling you into a warm hug. Amidst his embrace, you relayed a muffled response.  
“You… You know my name?”

Barton released you from the hug and held you at arms’ length.   
“Sorry, yeah. I knew Phil quite well and he was always yammering on about you.”   
“Always?”   
“Always. Don’t worry, it’s not like I read up on you in a file or anything. They wouldn’t record you as related to him for safety reasons.”

Tony stepped forward with his arms folded, wishing to keep the mood serious.   
“Well, Miss (y/l/n) – do you mind if I call you (y/n)? – (Y/n) is going to be staying here for a bit.”   
“Oh, that’s cool. I’m staying here too, helping out with some of the construction work. I suppose you saw everything on telly?” You looked down at your feet and folded your arms.   
“Not everything…”

* * *

 

“That rat bastard…” Barton exclaimed after the situation had been relayed to him. His reaction was different to Tony’s but comforting nonetheless. Barton also felt cheated. Cheated of a victory.   
“Mr Barton here has a personal vendetta against your ‘friend’…” Tony leaned over to explain. You were all sat around the bar after Tony had suggested a drink to soften the blow.   
“Son of a bitch caught me off-guard. Made me his PA for a while.”   
“Yes, I can imagine that being manipulated against your own will is particularly troubling.” You muttered, trying to hide the bitter resentment seething from you.

“Steve brought her back here where she’s gonna stay until we clear this whole thing up.”   
“Sounds like a plan to me.” Barton said, necking his drink and banging the glass back down on the table. Tony winced at the sound – though whether it was because of the volume of the crack or simply that it risked shattering the glass, you couldn’t discern. Barton seemed indifferent and continued speaking.   
“And when will she start training?”

You blinked and looked between he and Tony.   
“Training?”  
“Yeah,” Clint nodded, “training. Look, I’m all for believing that Loki wouldn’t set foot in here but at the end of the day, we know that he’s going to try and get to you. He _is_ that bold and he _is_ that stupid. I don’t want to see you get dragged into this further because you couldn’t defend yourself.”   
“It sounds to me like it’ll only drag me in further.”

Tony leant back in his chair, seemingly weighing up all the options. Clint leaned forward, placing his hands over yours. They were surprisingly soft for a professional archer and freelance construction worker.   
“I’ll train you myself. Nothing too strenuous, just enough to keep you on your toes in case he comes snooping.” You looked to Tony and he shrugged: he seemed less surprised about the offer from Barton.

“Okay… But nothing much, right?”   
“Nothing I don’t think you can’t handle.” He winked, giving your hands a gentle squeeze and then pulling away.   
“That’s a little open-ended…”

With a wink, Clint Barton stood up and pulled his phone from his pocket. He dialled a number and then placed the receiver to his ear.   
“I gotta make a few calls but I’ll see you later.” He said, nodding to Tony before taking himself away.   
“Told ya’ he’d start calling people,” Tony said, “but hey, so long as he’s gone, I can show you where you’ll be staying if you want.”


	7. Pain

You had never thought that you lived in the fast lane, but now there was no denying it. Everything in the Avengers Towers seemed to run at double the speed, and it put your old life to shame. You had presumed that the life of a billionaire was relaxed and luxurious, but it seemed that Tony was up every day at the crack of dawn – building things, fixing the tower, sometimes even just sitting in the lab and looking at paperwork. He really cared about putting his life back together, regaining some normality.

Of course you wouldn’t have known all of this if you hadn’t also been awake. At first you were restless in your new quarters, and the overwhelming comfort of the expensive mattress kept your eyes from staying closed. Then it began to feel more like insomnia. You simply couldn’t sleep when you felt like you should be looking over your shoulder for Loki all the time. You could picture him in your home, you could picture yourselves talking as if he wasn’t a monster, so it was all too easy for you to picture him appearing out of nowhere in your new home.

When you expressed as much to Clint, he decided to pounce on the opportunity and set up training sessions as early as 4 in the morning. Not that you were complaining, you were awake as it is, and, if you were being honest, the training was tiring you out and making much easier for you fall asleep at night.

It was during one of these early morning sessions that Thor arrived on Earth. Clint’s training involved simply building up your strength and knowledge of combat. You had been taking out a little pent-up anger on the boxing pads Clint was holding, when a flash of lightning outside stilled your hand.   
“You’ll get used to that.” Barton chuckled, removing the pads. “He likes dramatic entrances.”

Apparently SHIELD had tried several methods of communication with Asgard, but ultimately they had reached out to Dr Erik Selvig, a known acquaintance of the Asgardian, who had suggested speaking to the sky where he assured everyone that the gatekeeper of the Bifrost, Heimdall, would be listening. It seemed all too simple but after a few verbal requests, Heimdall had obliged and summoned the God to ‘Midgard’.

Thor looked absolutely huge – even in the large expanse of the Tower’s foyer.  
“Greetings, Barton.” He boomed, though his expression seemed less than civil. This was not the first time you had seen the image of Thor (blonde locks and big muscles made him a goldmine for the press) but it was the first time you had met him, and it wasn’t long before your sadistic mind presented you with the sickening reminder that you had once been _engaged_ to this man.

“Thor, glad you got the message.” Barton said, holding out his hand. Rather than shaking it, as you were sure Barton had intended, Thor slapped his elbow into the archer’s hand before gripping Clint’s forearm firmly. It looked like some sort of medieval greeting, which you were pretty sure wasn’t a wholly inaccurate description, but still it took Barton by surprise.

“I am disgusted,” Thor grunted after retracting his arm, “that yet again Loki has evaded justice, worse still when I thought that all was well.”  
“Isn’t that always the way?”  
“Quite; though it makes it no less infuriating.”

“Who is the maiden?” Thor then said, turning to you. His eyes brought back all sorts of memories – of Asgard, of the engagement, of returning, and of Phil. Your knees buckled. Before you could even begin any sort of greeting with Thor, he was holding you upright and leading you further indoors.   
“I am flattered. Women swooning before me is not something to which I am accustomed.”   
“Cool it, goldilocks,” Clint chuckled, placing his hand against your forehead. “I think (Y/n)’s feeling sick.”

“I am less flattered.”

* * *

Once you had settled into a chair, Clint struck up conversation with Thor.   
“(Y/n) was the one who Loki came back to. Apparently they have some sort of history.”  
“I’d be interested to know what binds the two of you,” Thor said, procuring a gentle smile. He seemed to be a gentle giant, despite his intimidating appearance.

“It’s complicated.” You sighed. You still felt a bit unwell from your meltdown earlier and it wasn’t encouraging you to speak.   
“With Loki, I expected nothing less.”   
“I know you’re trying to reassure me, but it’s not helping. In fact, I think you’re probably making it worse.”

“(Y/n)-” Clint whispered but Thor held up a hand. Barton was sat on the other side of the table to you whereas Thor was close enough that he could lean forward and take your hands in his own.   
“If I have done anything to offend, I entrust unto you my deepest sympathies.” You looked up at him with wide eyes.   
“No, no, it’s nothing like that it’s just… You’re involved. In the history, I mean.”

Apparently Thor hadn’t been expecting that. It took him a minute to respond and when he did, you noted the serious tone he’d adopted.   
“Then you cannot exclude me from knowing it. Please, do not prolong my ignorance.”

With a nod, you sat upright in your seat and looked between Clint and Thor. You opened your mouth, but somebody else’s voice came out.   
“Hello? Anybody here?”   
“Steve Rogers, I swear to God, I’m going to throttle you.” Clint yelled back, flashing you an apologetic look.

“I went back to (y/n)’s house and picked up some more of her stuff. Loki’s still not there but-” Steve stepped into the room and saw Thor sat in a tiny chair, a grim expression on his features. He clamped his mouth shut.   
“This was important, wasn’t it?”   
“Somewhat…” Thor sighed, breaking into a smile and standing up to greet Steve. “It’s a pleasure to see you again Captain, though I wish it had not been quite so soon.”

Steve held up both of his palms and trotted to a seat, dropping a small bag – presumably with your belongings in – onto the floor by his feet.   
“Ignore me, pretend I never arrived. Just carry on.” With another disgruntled sigh, Thor returned to his seat and met your gaze once more.

“I don’t suppose Odin told you…” You sighed.   
“My father keeps many secrets, but I trust with good intent.”   
“Yes, but… You’d think that the subject of your marriage would be something open for discussion.”   
“My… My marriage?”

“That’s why I was in Asgard.” You said, suddenly painfully aware of the company in the room. “I’d been chosen as a potential bride for Thor – you – but I met Loki instead and we… hit it off.”   
“…the hell?” Clint gasped, turning to Steve who looked equally shocked.   
“When I met him, he wasn’t… like he is now. He was kind, and funny, and intelligent. I swear!”

“It is true.” Thor nodded, leaning back in his seat and pursing his lips. “Before Loki was lost to us, he was a different person. Less sadistic…”  
“I’m finding that hard to believe.” Steve said.   
“Believe what you will,” you found yourself snapping, “Loki and I shared… something.”

“It is understandable.” Thor agreed, “We were both different people not too long ago. I was more arrogant and he softer. Everyone is capable of change, Steven.”  
“A friend of mine once told me that when you’re a good man, the most important thing you can do is stay the same.”   
“And I’m sure that had Loki shared your upbringing and acquaintances, he might’ve been… better. But one cannot hope to change the past, only to control one’s own future. I suspect that this is where your story leads.”

You nodded and continued.   
“Odin found us in a less than flattering position. Despite nothing having happened, he deemed me suddenly unworthy for your hand, and sent me home immediately, without so much as letting us say goodbye. Loki must’ve felt cheated or betrayed or something because he searched for me.”   
“As I said: he took control of his fate. Even as a boy, Loki knew what he wanted and he will do as he sees fit to take it. His work ethic would be admirable were it not for his questionable morals.” Thor sighed, scratching his chin.

“It troubles me that my father never mentioned this.” He continued.   
“I imagine that he wanted to keep it all quiet, in case he pissed Loki off more.”    
“So he called the engagement off altogether.” Clint growled, his hands balled. “Never mentioned it to anyone.”

“You described having come from Miss (Y/n)’s home, Captain.” Thor then said. “Is it possible that I could be escorted there? I might be able to locate something as to Loki’s intentions from what was left behind.” Steve looked to you for permission and you waved your hand dismissively. Reliving everything had left you feeling a little flat.   
“I’ll take you. Steve’s only just got here.” Clint said, standing up. He and Thor promptly left the room.

Steve, on the other hand, dragged his chair over to your side and placed an arm around your shoulders.   
“Come here, kid.” He sighed, pulling your head into his neck and resting his chin on the top of your head. “It’s been rough ol’ time for you, I bet.”   
“You have no idea.” You said, laughing despite yourself. Steve rubbed your shoulder and gave you a quick squeeze.   
“Still we’re on the mend now. Thor’s here and if anyone can find Loki, it’s be him.”

You tried to breathe out calmly but it came out as more of a whimper than you would’ve liked.   
“I was… I was gonna ask him to move in with me.” You mumbled and Steve released you so that he could sustain the conversation more comfortably.    
“Who? _Loki_?”

You laughed, and wiped away a tear.   
“No, no. Phil. Before he… You know. I was going to ask him to move in with me.”   
“You were?”   
“Yeah… It might not have been the right time but I just knew that I was sad whenever he left the house and happy whenever he came back. That’s a good enough reason, right? If I’d have known that would’ve been the last time I saw him.” Steve placed his hand on your cheek and brushed away a tear with his thumb. “I kept making jokes about his domestic life whilst he was here. He’d always leave the windows open, or forget to hang his shirt up, or something. I figured that if I mentioned it enough times that I could casually bring up the subject, but…”

Steve pulled your head into his neck again as you began to cry. You placed a hand on his chest and clung to his shirt weakly as he shushed you.   
“Hey, hey, come on now. He wouldn’t want to see you like this.” You sniffed a little and then nodded. Steve placed a hand over yours and manoeuvred it to the centre of his ribcage. “You feel that?” He asked, and you nodded as the sound of Steve’s heart touched your fingertips. Thrum. Thrum. Thrum.

“Phil might be gone, but we’re still here – because of him. Our hearts keep on beating, the Earth keeps on spinning, and the grass keeps growing.” You sniffed again and giggled.   
“The grass keeps growing?”  
“I ran out of metaphors. Shut up.” Steve chuckled. “My point is: you’ll get through this. It might not feel like it now, but you will.”

* * *

The morning’s events had been troublesome and you found yourself taking it out on a punch bag in the training room. Clint and Thor still hadn’t returned from your house and so you’d been forced to continue training on your own. Steve had set up the punching bag for you before leaving to go for a jog.   
“Tony’s around somewhere, but this’ll keep you occupied.”   
“And if I knock it off the railing?” You said with a smirk.   
“Then I’m entering you into a heavyweight boxing championship.” He winked, securing the equipment to the railing. “Don’t overdo it.”

Every punch became more and more painful – you had long forgotten Steve’s advice. You’d even abandoned the boxing gloves, settling for cloth wrapped around your knuckles instead. You wanted to feel everything. Every hit. Every pound. You needed to feel it. As if it was some of sort of twisted reminder that you could still feel anything… That you weren’t just numb.

You threw your energy into the sturdy sack, hitting and cracking, smacking and slapping; any way you could think to attack it. Soon your assaults became less uniform and you simply kicked and struck and fought with any and all of the stamina you still possessed. It became a tumultuous onslaught of flailing limbs that grew to be more and more painful as your body weakened. The velocity of the exercise was beginning to take its toll on you and tears prickled your eyes as you let all of your anger loose onto an invisible enemy. Except it wasn’t invisible. The enemy had a face and a name, both of which you could picture with terrifying realism.

After one final swing, you collapsed to your knees and the punching bag swung precariously in front of your reddened face. You took ragged breaths. You couldn’t see straight; all you could see was red. You gathered your hands into your lap and tried to stop them shaking. Everything hurt. Your heart, your fists, your muscles. Hot tears dripped down your cheeks and onto the wooden floor.

After a few, trickier breaths, you placed a hand against the punching bag and stood, albeit on shaky legs. You regained your balance and began to unravel the cloth on your hands. As you did so, you turned to leave the gym.

That was when you saw _him_.


	8. A Promise is a Promise

You weren’t sure how long Loki had been skulking there, but it didn’t matter. Not now. He was stood in the doorway and watched you with emotions indescribable.

All of your fears abandoned, your anxieties forsaken, you stormed across the gym and kicked him in the gut. Loki stumbled backwards and collapsed, his head cracking against the floor.   
“You son of a bitch…”

You stepped over his reeling form and straddled him, placing your hands around his throat.   
“You presumptuous, arrogant, sick son of a bitch.” You growled, tightening your grip and watching the colour begin to drain from Loki’s face. Was he not going to fight back?

“You’ve got a whole lot of nerve showing your face here again. Don’t you have anything to say for yourself?”

But it turned out he didn’t. As your grip blocked the air from his lungs, Loki seemed perfectly content to just lie there… Looking at you. Peacefully.

A pair of hands grabbed at your shoulders and heaved you backwards and Loki rolled over to cough and splutter. You kicked and yelled objections but you were stilled by Loki’s saviour. Tony crouched by your side and lifted you up with both his arms around your waist. It took all of his strength to hold you back. He quietly tried to calm you but your fury had overwhelmed you.

All Tony could do was hold you against him as your dark eyes watched Loki sit back against the wall and pant.   
“What the fuck-”   
“Watch your language!” Tony murmured into your ear with a low chuckle. He had pressed his forehead against your temple in an attempt to calm you but it was having little effect currently. “Honestly, what would the Captain say…”   
“Steve’s not here.” You hissed back. “So no-one in this corridor would have any objection to me kicking your teeth in – unless you tell me why the hell you’re holding me back.”

“Believe me, no-one wants this bastard dead more than I do. But he’s Thor’s brother. Sort of. Don’t you at least owe it to him to keep Loki alive, just for now?” You scoffed at the suggestion.   
“I don’t owe Thor jack shit! I only met him this morning, and his dad arranged a marriage between us for crying out loud.”   
“Alright: then do it for me.” Tony said. “Do it because I asked you to, alright?”

You paused, looking between the ghost-faced Asgardian sprawled on the floor before you and the brunette at your side. You relaxed in Tony’s arms and sighed, letting as much of your anger go as you could.   
“Okay… Fine. But I’m not making any promises for later.”

Tony pressed a gentle kiss to the top of your head before adjusting his grip on your waist. In your surge of rage, you had momentarily abandoned your crippling feelings of exhaustion. You were grateful that Tony decided to keep one arm around your waist as he spoke to Loki.   
“And you…” You could tell by the gravelly tone of his voice that he was struggling to hold it together. “Are we gonna have a problem?”   
“I have no intention of leaving, I assure you. I hope that is no cause for your concern.”   
“At the minute, the only person I’m concerned for is right where I want her – with me, and not you. So, yeah. For now, we’re good.”

* * *

 

“What do you mean you want to stay?” Tony yelled, but Loki barely reacted. He simply stood with his hands behind his back with the epitome of calm written across his face. You were sat at a dining table with a strong cup of coffee warming your hands whilst the recently returned Steve had a chair of his own by your side. Tony bore a wide stance with his hands balled and his back slightly arched. Clint and Thor had not yet returned, despite Stark having called Barton immediately to update him. Tony was on his own.

“I intend to atone for what I have done.” Loki said, eyes flickering in your direction. You, however, stared furiously at your coffee cup, letting Steve glare resentfully on your behalf. There was a 50% chance you’d either feel sick or the urge to kill him should you meet his gaze; for both your sake and his, you averted your eyes.   
“You’re going to need more than a few weeks’ holiday to make up for all the shit you put us through.”   
“I understand, but I have no alternative. Unless you can offer some better suggestion.”   
“How about an old priest and a young priest?”

You smirked and looked down at your lap.   
“You seem pretty intent on redeeming yourself.” Steve declared, glaring at Loki with low brows.   
“My motives have shifted. I am here to honour a promise I once made.”  
“A promise?” Tony laughed scornfully, “With who? Nobody here would make a deal with the devil.”

But Tony was so very wrong and Steve didn’t need to see Loki’s eyes move to know who he was referring to.   
“I told you that I would not abandon you.”

Deep down, you knew that you should face your fears but the opportunity was taken from you. Thor burst into the room and Clint trotted along behind him. The Asgardian turned Loki around and pulled him into what could only be described as a spine-crushing hug.   
“You continue to vex me.” Thor mumbled into his brother’s shoulder before releasing him. Just as quickly as he had initiated a hug, however, Thor balled up a fist and threw it square into Loki’s face.

You looked up from your coffee cup in time to see Loki hit the floor, a hand covering his nose where blood now gushed.    
“How dare you deceive these people!” Thor yelled. “And manipulate this good woman! Does your fraudulence know no bounds?”   
“That is only partially true… I have done little wrong to (y/n).”

“Bullshit! Was that just an Asgardian thing or can anyone get in on this game of whack-a-mole?” Clint growled, feeling anger swelling in him.    
“Don’t see the point. You’d have to do a lot to beat (y/n)’s score.” Tony said, a smirk spreading onto his face. Clint looked at you and any anger dissipated. Tony continued his descriptions. “She would’ve killed the fucker if I hadn’t got there first. Heard him hit the ground like a sack of shit and by the time I got upstairs he was white as a sheet and limp as a noodle!”

Clint was doubled over with laughter and had to excuse himself, after which the original conversation ensued.    
“I do not wish to be a burden-”   
“Well you should’ve thought of that before you invaded our planet.” Tony snapped. Loki growled before continuing.

“I do not wish to be a burden, but without your co-operation I shall simply keep returning. I shall not concede.”  
“For what purpose?” said an agitated Steve. “To follow (y/n) around like a lost dog? Not a chance.

Loki wiggled his nose and then replaced his hand as more blood began to spill free.   
“Upon (y/n)’s request, I will leave – but not before, and not for anyone else. In the meantime, I shall attempt to amend my other mistakes, perhaps by assisting in the fix of this building.”

You looked up from your coffee cup and met Loki’s eyes that hadn’t for a moment drifted from you. You gazed at him, searching for any sign that he was lying but then began to wonder whether you would be able to tell. You hadn’t before. It was then that you noticed where everyone else’s attention was focused: on you.

 _Of course_ , you thought. They were all waiting for you to send him away, to give your word. But there something in Loki’s face that you couldn’t ignore – he was either hoping that you would let him stay, or he already knew that you would. Until you could distinguish between those two things, you didn’t feel safe making any decision.

You stood up and cleared your throat, shooting Tony a look that said: ‘Don’t fight me on this’.   
“I’ll fix up his nose, and then I’ll decide. It’s the least I can do after I almost choked him to death.”

Nobody else saw it. They were too busy looking at you with shock. But you saw it – Loki had sighed. It was small and subtle and inaudible, but blindingly obvious. Loki hadn’t expected you to submit to him at all. He had hoped you’d forgive him. Loki had hope.

You stepped between the two Asgardians and offered your hand to him. Making no expression that might give him away, Loki accepted the gesture and in silence you led him from the room. Once in the lab, you retrieved a med-kit and a bowl of hot water before pulling up a couple of stools for you both. Knowing what Loki was capable of should’ve frightened you but you’d not felt threatened when you were close to him before and you didn’t intend to start now.

“Can you breathe?” You asked monotonously as you rifled through the green case. Loki nodded his head gently but you frowned.   
“I meant through your nose. I can tell you’re still breathing or we’d have bigger problems on our hands. Can you breathe through your nose?” Loki shook his head.   
“Didn’t think so. It looks pretty swollen but thankfully it’s not deformed. Broken but nothing a little ice and some painkillers won’t fix.” You said, retrieving a cloth from the med-kit. You dunked the small rag into the hot water and rinsed it out, before pinching it between a pair of tweezers.   
“This might smart so… I don’t know; hold something.”

Loki began to twine his fingers with those on your spare hand until you pulled it away.   
“ _Hold something else_.” You snarled as you dabbed the hot cloth against Loki’s philtrum. Immediately the dried crimson came away and you were confident that you wouldn’t have to spend long cleaning Loki up. For now, you could just sit in silence and-

“I’m sorry.” Loki mumbled. You drew your hand away and glared at him purposefully, imploring him to stop talking lest you hurt him further.   
“It’s too late for apologies Loki. You could’ve been honest with me from the start, but you weren’t.”   
“And I intend to-”  
“ _Stop_ talking, I swear to God. Your face is tender, remember, and I won’t hesitate to press this cloth a little harder than I should. So stop talking or my hand might just slip.”

Loki shut his mouth but did not look away. He continued to watch you intently as you cleared the blood of his face and slower than you would like, you finished up.   
“I’ll get you some ibuprofen and then I’ll find you some ice. If your nose starts bleeding again, pinch it just here and keep your head forward.”

Loki nodded softly and you began to pack away the med-kit.   
“I don’t know where Stark will put you up for the night, but when you-”  
“I do not think that my speech has convinced them to let me stay. Not as much as it should have anyway. The appearance of my brother somewhat diluted my conviction.”

You sighed and shut the med-kit case with a resounding click.   
“I’ll talk to them,” you deadpanned. “But that’s it. No more favours. You don’t owe me anything, and I sure as hell don’t owe you anything. If you choose to stay, it’s for your own gain – as I’m sure you’re used to. Do it for yourself, and not out of some misplaced affection towards me. Understand?”

Loki’s eyes neither widened or narrowed but something had changed within them. You could see the cogs whirring in his head.   
“I… Why would you-”  
“Call me naïve.”

Loki laughed breathily.   
“You _are_ a little naïve, I suppose. Beautiful, modest, quirky, and, as you said, a little naïve – but on the bright side, not boring.” Your mouth parted a little and you threw your eyes down. You should’ve seen that one coming. Despite those words originating several years ago, there was no way you could forget them. Every second of that night in Asgard was ingrained into your memory and being reminded of it now made your head feel heavy.

“As I was saying; when you go to bed tonight, keep your head propped up on some pillows and it’ll help the swelling go down.” You escaped the room as quickly as your legs could carry you.


	9. A Test of Strength

“Clint, _please_ ,” you panted as you hit the boxing pad weakly, “let me stop. I’m going to pass out.”   
“You’re not going to pass out. I won’t let you.”  
“That’s really reassuring.” You spat, throwing your hand forward again and hearing the dull thud as it hit leather.

Loki was sat in the corner of the gym on one of the benches. He rested his head in his hands as he watched you train. Your grey shirt was far too big for you but was drenched in sweat nonetheless, and he couldn’t help but notice that your jogging bottoms were emerald in colour… He convinced himself to think nothing of it as you continued to argue with Clint.

“(Y/n), you’ve been training for 30 minutes.”   
“30 _long_ minutes. I’m a professional couch potato, Barton, and I’m good at my job. I don’t box, I don’t lift weights – I don’t even run! If you ever see me running you should probably run too, because that means something is chasing me.”   
“So you’re a little out of practice. Stop whining and hit me.”  
“I’ll hit you properly in a minute and it won’t be where you want it.”

“It’d be a vast improvement. Honestly, I’m beginning to think that you’re tired because you’ve wasted all your energy complaining.”   
“May I make a suggestion?” Loki called out.    
“ _No!_ ” You and Clint simultaneously shouted. Loki frowned and rolled his eyes.

As the yelling continued, Loki pulled your water bottle out of your sports bag and wandered over. He was supposed to be helping Stark with some construction work but had been dismissed from it; apparently the others were still not quite comfortable with him living there. So he’d elected to sit in on your training session and help out where he could, though you also were less than keen to acknowledge him. Had the gesture of allowing him to stay not been so significant, Loki might’ve been hurt.

You barely glanced at him as you accepted the water bottle and put it to your lips. After cooling off and having a chance to breathe, you resumed conversation.   
“Just… give me 5 minutes. I’m not a super soldier, I’m not a trained assassin, and I’m not a God. I need a break.”

After a brief pause, Clint sighed and smiled, pulling the boxing pads off of his hands.   
“You’re a real trooper, you know that?” He chuckled.   
“Yeah, I know.”   
“Forget the training for now. I should really be helping Stark with the tower anyway.”

Clint tossed the pads aside and ruffled your hair before leaving the training room. You took another swig of water and rolled your shoulders as you wandered back to your belongings in the corner of the room. Loki followed you. After placing your bottle on the floor, you pushed your palms to the sky and stretched. You then pushed your hands into your back and arched your spine until that too clicked pleasurably.

“I haven’t seen you stretch like that since you read Gylfi and Svala.” He mused, lowering himself back onto the bench. You glared at him over your shoulder.   
“Shouldn’t you be – how did you put it? – atoning for your actions?”  
“I’d much rather be with you.”   
“That makes _one_ of us.”

Loki chuckled and reached for your bag, apparently intending to carry it for you. However, you snatched it away before he could. Were you being childish or vigilant? How were you supposed to tell in the presence of a renowned trickster?   
“I can carry my own things.”  
“I do not doubt it. My apologies.”

“What are you doing?” You snapped, stepping forward and staring down at Loki. “You’ve been here for a day and you haven’t done a damn thing save for follow me around. The Avengers’ trust in me depends on you behaving yourself. It’s not out of the question for them to suspect me of being some pawn in one of your grand schemes. Or is that how you’d have it? Me, tossed out on my own, primed and ready to come running right back to you? I may be naïve but I’m not that stupid so you can cut it out.”

“You talk faster than you think.” Loki muttered. “I did contemplate twisting this situation to my advantage, but that is no way to instil trust amongst your peers.”  
“Trust? You destroyed trust a long time ago. We’re teetering between whether you live to see another day or not.” You adjusted the bag strap on your shoulder that threatened to abandon you in the heat of your rage.

“I daren’t test your patience again.” Loki said calmly. “You almost succeeded previously.”   
“Not that you put up much of a fight.”   
“I did not.”

You paused and let his words sink in. With anyone else they wouldn’t have been significant but there was something uncharacteristic about them. Loki was too narcissistic – too intent on self-preservation – to simply have _let_ you kill him. Let alone admit to it.   
“Why… why didn’t you? You could see that I was just angry. If you’d wanted to then you could’ve easily overthrown me.”

“Then it seems that you already know the answer.”   
“Yeah, but I’d much prefer that you say it so I can pretend I don’t know you as well as I think I do.” You said. Loki chuckled and dropped his head.    
“It’s like you said: if I’d wanted to, I could’ve defended myself. But I didn’t want to. I couldn’t bring myself to. I deserved everything that you were throwing at me, all of the hatred and the anger.”

You adjusted your bag strap again, only this time it was so you had an excuse to look away from him.   
“Is this your big apology?” You muttered scornfully and Loki shook his head.   
“No. No apology is enough to come back from what I’ve done – the harm I’ve caused you.”   
“It wasn’t just me, Loki. You hurt Tony too.”

He looked up at you with disbelief on his face.   
“Tony?”  
“Yes. Tony; and Steve, and Bruce Banner, and Dr Erik Selvig, and your brother, and Phil’s family, and everyone else who had loved ones stolen from them because of what you did. You can’t just come back here to win _me_ over. It doesn’t work like that.”

“I… I understand.” Loki mumbled, sounding very much like he didn’t. You sighed and were about to continue speaking when Clint opened the door and poked his head around it.

“Hey, Emo-Rapunzel, you’re needed.”   
“Are you addressing me?” Loki said, abandoning any sign of emotion and standing.   
“Yes, I’m ‘addressing you’.” Barton mimicked. “Stark says that you’re supposed to be out here helping him fix up the tower. Or are you pulling the rug out from under us already?”   
“Stark dismissed me.”   
“I don’t give a shit. He’s clearly changed his mind now. Get out here – quick sharp.”

Loki sighed as Clint shut the door and began to make his way to the exit. You pretended to rifle through the contents of your sports bag, wanting to give Loki a wide berth before following him out of the door. However, he called out to you before leaving and reluctantly you looked up. He was stood at the open door and gazed at you solemnly over his shoulder.

“(Y/n)… You may not believe me but I do not care at this point. You simply must know that-” Loki leaned out of the doorway, “ _Yes, I’m coming!”_ He sighed and looked at you again, noting the look of curiosity and concern on your face.

“You must know that I would never hurt you. Not intentionally, not even in self-defence. I would rather have died at your hand than lay one upon you. _That_ is why I am here: to make up for all pain I caused in taking this… _Phil_ … away from you. If the Son of Coul was as dear to you as you say, then my actions will have caused you a great deal of harm. Thus I intend to do a great deal more to resolve that.”

Loki nodded at you, silently praying that you understood, and then took his leave.


	10. Old Flames

Yet more weeks passed in the tower and contrary to what you might have hoped for, the levels of tension within the tower were ever as high. Despite this, however, Loki continued to make good on his word. In silent submission he followed Stark’s instructions and gradually helped to complete construction on the bottom floors. Windows were fitted, debris cleared, and foundations replaced. It was finally beginning to look like the tower again (according to Tony).

“A little higher…” Stark directed and you pushed the beam to the edge of your fingertips. “(Y/n), higher.”   
“Fuck you Stark. I’m a short-ass in comparison to Captain Steroids over there.” You said, raising yourself up onto the balls of your feet, though it made little difference. Steve was on the other end of the beam, holding it at the right height with ease. It didn’t even budge as he chuckled at your joke. _Show off_.

“I still say that my magic would have fixed this tower days ago.” Loki smirked as he nimbly slipped under the beam and took your place. You weren’t sure how long he’d been there but you were glad he was. The muscles in your arms groaned with relief as you shook them out. Even if you’d have been able to get it to the right place, you probably wouldn’t have been able to hold it long.   
“And as I told you then,” Tony growled, booting up the blowtorch on his suit’s glove. “I don’t want your magic anywhere near my tower. If you help at all, you’ll do it my way.”   
“As you insist.”

Tony wandered over to Steve and held his hand to the edge of the beam. The thrusters whirred into action and began fusing the beam to the nearby frame. It seemed to melt together like butter on a hot knife. The action, however, caused Tony’s shirt to ride up a little more than could be deemed humble. You trotted over and, with a giggle, tugged the edges of his shirt back down. Tony’s hand wavered slightly in surprise.   
“Just protecting your modesty, Stark.” You said with a playful roll of your eyes. Steve chuckled again.   
“You’re the only one who’s ever complained.” Tony replied. After Steve’s end of the beam was sufficiently secured, he dropped an arm around your shoulders and gave you an affectionate squeeze. “Then again, maybe you just need a little persuading.”

Loki cleared his throat.   
“How long would you have me sustain this pose, Stark?” He muttered. After another playful nudge, Tony trotted away and began fusing the other end of the beam into place. Steve replaced him by your side, wiping his hands on his trousers as Tony muttered to himself.   
“If Pyro was here, this’d be a whole lot quicker.”

“Pyro? Who’s Pyro?” You asked. You’d brought out a jug of water and some glasses earlier but had gotten so caught up in work that you hadn’t had time to pour them. It was only when you noticed a bead of sweat running down the billionaire’s brow that you deemed it a suitable time for a break. You approached the rickety table that the tray sat on and separated the stack of glasses.   
“Just some kid I teach over at Xavier’s.”   
“I didn’t know you taught mutants!” You smiled, handing a drink to a gracious Steve.   
“I haven’t been doing it long. It’s a good way to waste some time, and let me tell you, some of those kids are geniuses. They have a better understanding of quantum mechanics than half of the adults I work with. They just needed a half-decent teacher to introduce them to it.”

“Modest as ever…” Steve murmured, nudging you gently. You bit back a smile and continued your conversation. Tony had finished fusing the beam to the frame and let the glove power down. Loki looked relieved, letting his arms fall to his sides again.   
“And this _Pyro_ … What does he do?” You asked as Tony poured himself a glass of water and took a swig.   
“His name’s John really, but he’s super proud of himself. Gave himself this whole persona based on his powers and prances about the school boasting about his talents.”

“Sounds familiar…” Steve muttered again. Loki smirked, moving to your side and leaning back against the table. Tony was too far gone talking to notice.   
“But get him in a lecture and he doesn’t know what to do with himself. I’ve offered him some extra sessions with me. To come over and help me in the lab because he’s a really bright kid but he’s just not suited for the classroom.”

“Tony…” You sung.   
“I really hope he agrees; he’s got so much potential and I don’t want that wasted. It’d be a real shame. He might be a bit of a sociopath but who isn’t nowadays? And anyway-”   
“Tony!” You laughed and he finally shut his mouth. Steve was grinning smugly.   
“What?”   
“You’ve been talking about this kid for at least a minute and you still haven’t answered my question.”

“Sorry… I, uh, what was the question?” You laughed again, polishing off your drink.   
“Don’t worry about it.” You smiled, nudging Steve with your shoulder. He shushed you and finished his own drink. Once again Tony was oblivious.   
“Listen, I think we’re good here. That’s the majority of the structural work finished so all we need to do is clean up all this junk and we’re good to finish this floor.”

“If no-one has any objections, I should like to clean up.” Loki said, stepping forward. You shared a glance with Tony and Steve before the former sighed.   
“Alright, you can use my bathroom. Just don’t waste the hot water.”   
“You have my thanks.” Loki nodded cordially before making to leave.

You noted the way that he wiped his brow and remembered that one glass had been left untouched.   
“Hey, Loki.” He stopped and turned, facing you fully with his hands behind his back, though judging by the little movements they made, he was wringing his hands. “I don’t care what order you do it in, but have something to drink at some point, okay? Maybe something to eat too.”

“Miss (Y/l/n), I am, by your standards, a God. I can endure more physical strain than your own species.”   
“Nonetheless. I don’t need you passing out when you’re working. Eat something.” Loki narrowed his eyes and then let the ends of his mouth curl upwards slightly. He bowed his head and clicked his heels together.   
“You have my word.” He said before leaving the room.

After Loki had left, you poured yourself another drink and sipped at it gently.   
“Well someone has warmed up to the Asgardian…” Tony mused, removing his metal glove and setting it down.   
“Oh shut up. I’m just making sure he doesn’t keel over in the corridor, otherwise I’d be the one who has to deal with it.”

Steve chuckled and began to tidy up the empty crockery.   
“She can’t help being nice, Stark. Unlike _some_ it is possible.”   
“What do you mean? I’m nice!” He protested.   
“Just not to him…” You muttered over the rim of your glass.   
“Oh, like he deserves rainbows and ponies and rays of fucking sunshine – I don’t see you kicking Rogers’ ass about it. He hasn’t exactly been rolling out the red carpet.”

“I don’t like the guy,” Steve sighed, turning back around with his arms folded, “but I can appreciate that he’s worked hard. Though I hate to admit it, he hasn’t screwed us over yet.”   
“This is bullshit!” Tony yelled. You mean to tell me that you’re actually falling for this redemptive crap?”   
“Everyone’s capable of change.”   
“I don’t believe it… I don’t believe it.”

As Tony continued to repeat his exclamations, you packed the glasses and jug onto the tray and escaped the room into another. Thor stood from the table to greet you as you entered the kitchen.   
“Please… Don’t do that.” You asked and Thor chuckled as he fell back into his seat. You piled the tableware into the sink and convinced yourself that you would clean them later, instead joining Thor at the table in one of the few rooms to have actually been entirely fixed. The kitchen windows sparkled and the new floors had been swept clean numerous times.  


“Sitting on your own?” You smiled as you sat down and he chuckled.  
“Silence provides ample food for thought.”  
“Dare I ask what you’re thinking of?”

“A concept so obscure and complex that our two peoples are united in how little we both know about it.” He said.   
“That sounds horribly cliché…” You chuckled, leaning back in your chair and kicking your feet up onto the table.   
“Love tends to be surrounded in them.”  
“Are you in love?” You asked, curious rather than in awe.   
“I may be, but I know not how it truly feels.” You cocked your head to the side. “How did you meet the Son of Coul?”

You almost fell off of your chair in shock. To say the question was abrupt was an understatement. You pulled your feet down from the table and sat up straight.   
“I’m sorry?”  
“Phil… The gentleman you loved. How did you first encounter him?” He asked, leaning forward onto his elbows and meeting your gaze. You stammered over various vowels before actually creating a comprehensive answer.

“I.. Uh… Well, it was just after Asgard actually.” Thor remained silent, listening intently. You took a breath and gulped. “When I came back from Asgard, SHIELD sent someone to investigate the event - I don’t know how they knew, but they did – and Phil was the agent. He sat me down, made sure I was calm, and talked to me. Just talked to me. At first it was about the markings in my garden, but then he just caught me up on what I’d missed whilst I was away. The news, the weather; it was nice. The most normal I’d felt since I’d been taken to another realm. But I think he knew that. Anyway, after that he kept coming back saying that he needed 'more photos’ for a case file or something. It started as every other weekend, then every Saturday until he was stopping by every other day. It was like a routine. I barely even noticed. It was only when I spotted that he hadn’t unlocked his phone as he was 'gathering evidence’ that I called him out on it. That was when he asked me out for a drink.”  
“That was it?”  
“Simple, right? He said he just liked talking to me, and I realised - after I finally accepted his invitation - that I liked talking to him too.”

Thor nodded his head gently and sighed.  
“A drink, you say?”  
“Just a drink. Well, _multiple_ drinks. He bought the first round and I got the second. Sort of took it in turns. We didn’t think to check the time until it was about 4 in the morning. He walked me home – mainly because his car was still at my house, but I gave him the benefit of the doubt.” You laughed, feeling your stomach turn at the memory. You could still hear the gravel crunching under your feet as you ambled down your driveway, Phil’s fingers timidly tangling with yours.

You shook your head and sniffed, looking back at Thor who gave you a sympathetic smile.   
“I understand. I wish that you had met him under better circumstances.”   
“It could’ve been worse. At least I met him at all. The alternative would’ve been staying in Asgard, in which case you and I would be in a very worrying situation.” Thor barked a laugh and his mane of hair trembled.

“You would’ve gone through with it? I’m not sure I could’ve done. My father would have suffered many a stern word.”   
“I didn’t have a choice, mate.” You laughed, leaning back in your chair again. For some reason talking to Thor about the events in Asgard didn’t make you feel sick. It was reassuring to know that he would’ve been in the same boat as you. Alone. Confused. “It wasn’t like I could hop on the next bus back home.”   
“I suppose not. Though you needn’t have feared. I would not have participated. A marriage with yourself, despite your many qualities, would not have functioned.”   
“I’m flattered.” You chuckled. “But you’re right. Arranged marriages aren’t a concept I see working out a lot of the time.”

As you finished speaking, Steve entered the room and jogged to the fruit bowl.   
“Ignore me; I’m not even here.” He sung as he picked up a banana and briskly jogged back out of the room again. When you returned your attention to Thor, he was leaning his head in his hand with a dreamy expression.   
“There is more than one reason that a marriage with yourself would not have worked…”

You blinked and looked between the Asgardian and the empty doorway. Steve could be heard whistling as he strolled down the corridor.   
“Thor,” you murmured, sitting upright again. This was a rollercoaster of a conversation. “Are you… saying what I think you’re saying?”   
“I cannot put a word to it, but… yes. I find the male species just as attractive as females. Particularly…” Thor cleared his throat. “Well, that’s not important.”

You leaned forward in your chair and opened your mouth to speak, but no words came out. You let the corners of your mouth curl upwards into an incredulous smile and laughed breathily instead.   
“A drink… Interesting.” He sighed, standing up and dusting his hands on his trousers. “Thank you for speaking with me, Miss (Y/l/n).” Thor said as he left. “It has been most informative.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so Pyro and Tony: they have literally never met in the MCU and the only time they were close in the comics was when Pyro busted out of prison and the Avengers had to deal with it. So, I suppose you're wondering where that came from? Allow me to tell you. A Steve x Reader fanfiction called Winter's Flame - you can read it here on AO3 or there is the complete story on Tumblr (http://imagine-that-marvel.tumblr.com/post/130177015336/winters-flame-masterlist) - was one of the first fanfictions I read. I really, really love that story and have recently gotten to know its author quite well. Despite not being intentional, the author, imagine-that-marvel, received a flood of comments asking about Pyro and Tony and when they were going to hook up in the story. Well, the rest is history... I have since become the captain of the 'Pony' ship. It won't be featured massively in this story, nor will Thundershield, because it is not the main relationship I want to focus on. Obviously that is Loki and the reader. However I couldn't write this fic and not put my OTPs in it. I hope you'll understand and tolerate my crazy-ass ship because it is precious to me and I will throw you overboard otherwise. Aside from that, I hope that you enjoyed the chapter!


	11. Confession

Thor followed Steve’s tracks down the corridor, looking left and right, hoping to run into him. It was difficult to navigate the tower quickly whilst still appearing nonchalant. He turned corner after corner in his search and ultimately decided to move up to the residential floor. The elevator doors slid open and the search began again. Thankfully the corridor lit up with the sound of Cap’s voice – faint but audible, talking to someone nearby.

Thor strutted forward, looking left and right again, as the sound of Steve became louder and louder. He turned another corner and stopped. He was passing the open door to Tony’s room… where Loki sat on the bed. Betwixt his hands was a photo frame onto which water from his wet hair dropped, running off of the glass pane and pooling at the base. Loki bowed his head and just for a minute, Steve’s muffled voice was muted. Loki sniffed.

Abandoning his quest, Thor adopted a new one. When the elder Odinson had been arrogant and head-strong, Loki had been his conscience (even if he didn’t always listen). So it was only fitting that he now returned the favour, as he had always hoped to do. Despite it all, Loki was still his brother. Steve could wait.

Thor closed the door behind him but Loki did not flinch, did not acknowledge him.   
“Brother-”   
“Have you come to mock me?” Loki growled, voice quivering like a violin string. His grip on the photo frame tightened and Thor stepped closer in an attempt to glance at the contents.

“Mock you? No…” He said sincerely. “Loki, something is the matter. Please tell me what it is.” But Loki did not speak. Instead he glared at the photo frame harder, allowing Thor to creep forward. As he neared, the image within became visible. It was a picture of (y/n). Your hair was a mess, your head was turned slightly, and your face was bemused. Tony was holding the camera at arm’s length, a large goofy grin on his face, and he had his other arm around your shoulders, pulling you into the shot. The tips of your fingers could be seen in the bottom corner of the photo as you attempted to push away the camera. However, Clint – whose laughing face could just be seen over your shoulder – was also attempting to hold you in place. Judging by your apparel in the image, you had just woken up, and Barton and Stark had attempted to photograph you.

Thor had barely a moment to process the picture before Loki lifted the frame above his head and launched it into the wall on the other side of the room. The frame split into two and sunk to the floor, dragging the photo down with it. Loki panted heavily and his wet hair had fallen in front of his face. With a sad smile, Thor sat down opposite his brother, blocking the view of the shattered photo frame. He tucked Loki’s hair behind his hair.

“Calm yourself brother. You are no good to anyone when you succumb to your rage.”   
“It is my only consistent quality.” He replied with a low voice. Thor smirked.   
“Consistence is not always admirable. Consider Doctor Banner.”

Loki turned and shuffled away.   
“Am I a monster too?” He mumbled. Thor opened and closed his mouth again, realising his mistake.   
“You are not. You are my brother.”

Loki made no response, choosing to pout for a little longer.   
“I should not have gotten so angry.” He eventually sighed, standing up and approaching the broken photo frame. Thor kept an eye on him as he picked up the glass and wood. With a wave of his hand, the picture was safely secured again, as if it had never been ruined. Loki brought the frame back to the bed and sat with it, a sad smile breaking onto his features.   
“She is not mine to get angry over. I know that now. Nor would she tolerate such possessive behaviour.”

Thor deemed his own silence as a good thing. Loki was seemingly making progress, and if it was as genuine as it seemed, then interrupting – even to offer advice – was a bad idea.   
“It’s been tricky… helping these _imbeciles_ to rebuild their tower.” He continued with a bowed head. As he spoke, Loki traced a finger along the edge of the photo. “At first I couldn’t suppress my usual habits. I would enter a room and mark out exits, plan ahead; scheme. I cannot say that I have changed, but… I know that I want to. For her.”

“You know how I feel about (y/n),” Thor began softly, not wanting to exacerbate Loki’s emotions, “but I must remind you how poorly you know her.”    
“It’s complex. I know her yet I do not know her. I hold such obscure knowledge about her yet we only briefly spoke in our first encounter.” Thor remained silent again. “All upon Asgard… I talked with her, we laughed together, and I was convinced. I could feel it in my very bones, my gut. She was fantastic. Then I held her in my arms and I kissed her, and all I could think about was how right everything felt in that moment…”

“You would change yourself just for a woman you felt a momentary connection with?”   
“I’m not just changing…” Loki spat. “I’m changing _back_.”

Thor nodded and looked down, his hands in his lap. Loki stared ahead.   
“I want to revive what I thought we had. I thought that I’d succeeded after the death of her beloved but… She was distant. Cold. I held her in my arms under the moonlight and it was like embers of an extinguished fire. No longer flaming but still warm… It was then I knew: it was not she that had abandoned me; I had forsaken myself. I had been careless and callous. I had lost all that she shared with me and without it, there could be no connection. I want to rekindle what I once had, by becoming the man I once was.”

“Loki, I’m so proud of you.” Thor blurted out. Loki turned violently to look at his brother and laughed scornfully.   
“You’re… you’re proud of me?”   
“Yes, I-”   
“Who are you to say that you’re proud of me?” Loki snapped, leaping to his feet. “Do I look like I need your approval? Your pride?”

“Loki-” Thor began, holding his hands up.   
“I am not so pitiful that I need sympathy from you, _Thor_. Women have fawned over you for centuries but now that I finally find someone I am willing to work for, that’s when you decide to intervene. You and the man I once called father!”  
“Brother, you misunderstand-” But Loki was too far gone.

“How typical – I should have foreseen this! Once again, the mighty _Thor_ swoops in to steal the maiden and the villain is left behi-”   
“ _Sit down!_ ” Thor thundered, suddenly upon his feet, and Loki’s mouth clapped shut. He did not sit but he silenced.

After a pause in which he caught his breath, Thor pinched the bridge of his nose and exhaled deeply.   
“You are _not_ a villain; do you hear me? Not if you don’t want to be. And as for (y/n), I do not feel for her as you suggest.”   
“But…” Loki breathed. “I’ve seen how you are together.”   
“Then you are blinded by your own presumptions. She is nothing more than a friend, an acquaintance. We have admittedly grown close these last few days but…” Thor laughed airily. “I have no interest in (y/n) – unless it is to welcome her to our dysfunctional family as a sister.”

Loki’s face dropped.   
“You mean you… You…”  
“Brother, she is a fine woman and nobody is more deserving of happiness than her. If you think that you shall provide it, then I beg of you, go to her. You need only prove it, I assure you.”

The ends of Loki’s mouth rose slightly but he seemed intent on doubting himself.   
“I… That’s all I’ve ever wanted. For her to be happy.”   
“Then go.” Thor smiled, stepping forward and placing his hands on Loki’s shoulders. “Do what you have always done and fight for what you want. Fight for her, Loki, and I shall fight right alongside you.”

Suddenly exuberant, Loki burst into a smile and scurried for the door. However, before he escaped the room, he paused and turned his head to the side. Thor watched him with a tilted head. What could possibly be stopping him? Loki took a sharp breath before speaking.  

“Thank you… Thor…”

* * *

 

You flicked through the television channels mindlessly, tapping your bunny-slippered feet to the music of the documentary currently playing. Your pyjamas were tartan and soft, lulling you to sleep without warning. Your eyes wavered gently as you skipped through channel after channel after channel after channel…

A knock at the door pulled you out of your repetitive haze and you shook your head before shuffling to the door. Loki was the last person you expected to see on the other side. He met your gaze with wide eyes and opened his mouth to speak, though there was a significant lack of words formulated.   
“Can…” You turned away to place your hand over your mouth as you yawned violently. “Can I help you?”

“I, uh… Yes. You can.”   
“Then tell me how so I can go back to bed.”   
“I was wondering if you might talk with me.” He said after clearing his throat.   
“Talk to you?” You sighed, leaning against the door frame.   
“No, talk _with_ me. Not to me.”

“Alright, well, come get me in the morning and we can-”  
“Actually, if you would permit it, I should like to talk with you now.”   
“Loki,” you grumbled, rubbing your eyes. “It’s 10 o’clock at night.”

“Yes, well, I was having trouble getting here.” He mumbled, looking down but then promptly lifting his head again.   
“What? Did Thor punch you again? Because I swear-”  
“No, no,” Loki chuckled, holding up his hands. “It’s more a matter of getting in my own way.”

“I’m not sure I understand.” You sighed.   
“Confidence, (y/n). I lacked the courage to seek you out.” You lowered your brow and felt your pulse quicken. “Please, I only ask that you dine with me. Perhaps we could also share the drink you recommended earlier?”

“Are you telling me that you haven’t eaten or drunk since I asked you to this afternoon?”   
“If I said ‘no’, would you join me?” He asked. You folded your arms and bit the inside of your cheek, glaring at your feet as you mulled over his proposal. Loki let a knowing smile curl onto his face. As he had hoped for, you stepped out of your room and closed the door behind you, scowling simultaneously.   
“This doesn’t mean anything. I’ll make sure you eat, I’ll get you something to drink, and I’ll talk to you – or _with_ you, or whatever – then I’m going back to bed.”   
“That’s all I ask.” Loki said, offering you his arm. You ignored the gesture and shuffled down the dimly lit corridor on your own, arms still crossed. He smirked and hurried to catch you up.

“Nice slippers by the way…”   
“Fuck off.”


	12. When Time Stood Still

You attempted to keep your eyes open as you waited for the kettle to boil. You stood with your back to Loki who was doing who knows what. You had assigned him a plain china mug that looked horribly boring in comparison to your personal mug (which bore the emblem of your Hogwarts house).

The kitchen may have been intact but a horrible draft swum through the air nonetheless. The central heating did nothing to squash the arctic temperatures of the nearby rooms that still lacked windows. You rolled your shoulders a couple of times to dispel a shiver.

You spun around when you felt something brush over your back and Loki pulled away immediately. He was holding a blanket in his hands.   
“You seemed cold…” He said defensively, as he retreated; purposefully keeping his distance.   
“You’re not?” You snapped, feeling a little guilty but not enough to apologise.   
“No. I can bear it a little better than most.”

You nodded and turned back towards the kettle, thinking that would be the end of the conversation. You stirred the sugar around the bottom of the mug and ignored the feeling of Loki’s fingers as he secured the blanket over your shoulders. The kettle clicked and you made the tea, happy for the distraction and the caffeine.

You placed the mug in front of Loki and he smiled at you gratefully. After putting your own mug down, you began to rummage through the cupboards.   
“What do you want to eat?” You asked.   
“Whatever you would recommend.”   
“Don’t tell me that because I think there’s a pot of Ben and Jerry’s in the fridge and I’ve been convincing myself not to touch it.”

“Is it yours?” He asked and you paused, smirking to yourself.   
“If I said ‘no’, would you hold it against me?” Loki grinned.

You dropped the pot of ice-cream down in front of Loki and handed him a spoon that was far too long for its own good.   
“When I told you to eat something earlier, this isn’t what I had in mind.” You muttered and Loki chuckled as he pulled the lid off. You flopped into the chair opposite him. With your elbow on the table and your head in your hand, you reached out and dipped your spoon into the pot.

“So what did you want to talk about?” You sighed, after taking a second spoonful of ice-cream.   
“It is as I said: I wish to speak with you.”   
“Yeah, well, that makes it sound like you’ve got a specific topic in mind.”

Loki hummed and sucked on the end of his spoon.   
“Only somewhat…”   
“Alright then,” you sighed, “what topic have you _somewhat_ got?”   
“Well, to put it simply… I wanted to get to know you better.” You froze in your seat and stared at Loki incredulously.   
“You made me get out of bed for this?”

“Well I’m sure that the conversation would’ve been just as enjoyable in your bed – but I imagine we aren’t close enough for that.” Your mouth fell open and Loki suddenly cast his eyes down. “I… I’m sorry. That was… I should not have said it.”

After a sigh and a suppressed smile, you helped yourself to another spoonful of ice-cream.   
“It’s okay. I suppose you could’ve said worse. It is you, after all.”   
“Thank you…” Loki breathed, watching you with a grateful expression. That was the first time you’d forgiven him for something. It may have been small but Loki’s heart was bursting with hope.   
“So what do you want to know?”

The hours ticked by and the amount of Ben and Jerry’s in the pot slowly decreased. You and Loki had begun to participate in a quick-fire cross-examination session.   
“Favourite colour?”   
“Yellow. Winter or Spring?”   
“Autumn. Foot size?”   
“ _Foot size?_ ”  
“Yes, in case I purchase shoes for you.”   
“Do you plan on buying me shoes?”   
“Well, I mean… No…”   
“Then you don’t need to know my foot size.”

It was one of the most civil conversations you had shared in a while and despite yourself, you enjoyed it. When you could just forget the world and everything that had happened in it, Loki was capable of seeming perfectly normal. He could be funny and amusing and charming, with his renowned mischievousness thrown in for good measure.

“So why did you want to know all of this then?” You eventually asked with a tired smile, scraping at the edge of the dangerously empty pot. You could feel your stomach groaning with the weight of it all.    
“It is difficult to explain.” He sighed, battling your spoon with his own for the last portion of ice-cream. With an irritated smirk, you conceded and abandoned the cutlery, turning to him instead.   
“Well, let’s see.” You looked at the watch on your wrist. “It’s 4 in the morning and I’m hyped up on sugar and caffeine. I think we’ve got some time before I nod off. Enough time for you to explain.” Instead of laughing, as you had hoped he might do, Loki sighed again and ran a hand through his hair.

“You won’t like it.”   
“I don’t like a lot of things – as you now know.” Loki leaned back in his chair and bit his lip, looking left then back at you, then left again.

In a surge of courage, he got to his feet and moved to your side. The action took you by surprise and caused you to recede to the back of your chair. Loki knelt and took your hand.   
“I can’t help what I feel for you. I’ve tried – believe me, I’ve tried to ignore it – but every waking minute of the day and every dream at night sees you in my mind. It is stupid and strange and wonderful, but I know that it cannot work. Not like this. I wanted us to know each other better, to have something to build off of. When we met on Asgard, even you cannot deny what we shared. Since that day my feelings have never wavered, even if my morality did. I’m not asking you to forgive me for all I’ve done – it was truly horrendous – but I’m hoping that you might be able to admit that I’ve changed, that there is a chance for us in the future.”

The world seemed to be spinning and you pulled yourself out of Loki’s reach, panting and stumbling for the door. Loki followed you, a hand stroking your back in a fruitless attempt to console you.   
“I- I- I’m sorry,” you panted and Loki’s hand stilled.   
“You cannot tell me that you felt nothing… that I am unrequited.”  
“Loki, I can’t forget what you did.”   
“So don’t forget.” He pleaded, stepping in front of you looking up into your eyes. “Don’t forget! Remember, and mourn, and grieve. Hold it against me, remind me of it every morning and tell me of it every night. Write it in a card and give it to me for Christmas. I don’t care. It won’t change how I feel about you.”

“This is absurd!” You yelled and strutting back to the table. “You are clutching at straws, holding onto something that never even existed.”  
“That is not true.” Loki protested, following you. “You felt something then and I know it. We shared something beautiful. Maybe I destroyed the chance of rekindling that but you haven’t given me any evidence to suggest there isn’t still a spark.”

You opened your mouth to protest and then turned away, choosing a different angle to attack on. You could feel heat rushing to your eyes.   
“Back then… We’d known each other for a day, Loki! I was lost and alone, on another planet, engaged to a man I’d never met! Alright, so maybe I didn’t stop what happened between us, and I might have… enjoyed it, but I thought that I’d lost my freedom. I thought it would be the last thing I could do, that I could control. I didn’t know when I’d see home again.”

“Perhaps that is the case, but at the end of the day, that impromptu moment of passion caused something incredible to bloom. I cannot help what I felt for you then, what I have continued to feel for you since.”   
“We knew each other for a fraction of a second. Anything you feel or felt is not well-founded.”   
“Sometimes the greatest of things stem from the smallest of seeds.”  
“This is still absurd…”

Loki approached you with speed unrivalled and took your hands into his own.   
“Tell me then. Look me in the eyes and tell me you felt nothing then, that you feel nothing now. It is as I said: only with your word shall I go. If you should say it, I will leave and never return.”  
“Never?” You whispered.   
“Never. Just _tell me_ to go. Tell me that you don’t love me.”

You took a shaky breath and let yourself get lost in Loki’s wide eyes. You could see that your silence was equally killing and emboldening him.

“What’s going on?” Steve’s voice boomed as he burst into the room with his shield on his arm. Thor matched his speed with Mjolnir firmly in hand and his eyes scouring the room. Both of them had horribly messy hair and, judging by their attire, had clearly just rolled out of bed.

“We heard raised voices. Why do you not sleep?” Thor asked, stepping in front of Steve and lowering his weapon. Quickly, you took the opportunity to scurry away from Loki and towards Cap who had no hesitation in gathering you into his arms. You didn’t remember when you had started crying but there was no stopping you now.

“You promised you’d take care of me and I’m hoping honesty comes with that. Tell me I’m wrong. Tell me that he’s still the villain, that I shouldn’t be feeling like this, and that you need to take me somewhere safe again. Tell me I’m wrong… Please…” Steve looked up at Loki, eyes demanding an explanation. He pulled you against him and took a step back.   
“What the _hell_ is going on?”

“Steve-” Thor began.  
“What did you do?”   
“I assure you that my intentions were good.” Loki placated.  
“Yeah, well, clearly not. Look at her! Does she look calm to you right now?” Loki bowed his head.   
“She does not, and for that I have only regret.”

“Exactly. Look, I’ll level with you – for a minute you had me fooled. I thought that you’d changed.” You unburied your face from Steve’s chest and looked up at him with an open mouth. “I thought that maybe you were willing to do what was right for once. I mean you helped us fix up this place, you didn’t cause any trouble, and you were mostly polite and helpful. Hell, when Stark was being idiotic with the nail gun and you saved his ass, you were alright in my books.”

“I used to.” He said before turning to Loki. “So what the hell changed? Or were you conning us all along? What did you do?” Thor looked to his brother, melancholy in his eyes. Desperately he wanted this to be a misunderstanding.

“He told me he loved me.” You whispered.

“And I stand by that statement.” Loki said, watching you pull away from Steve and move towards him. The captain seemed a little reluctant to let you go but Thor gave him a reassuring glance.   
“I’m not a big risk taker…” You muttered, standing at arm’s length from Loki. He was smiling despite the obvious anxiety in his eyes. “The universe doesn’t exactly shower good things on me.”   
“Then do not rely upon the fates. Trust yourself… and tell me what is in your heart. I shall cope, no matter the outcome.”

You took a deep breath and released a shaky one.   
“I think... I think I fell in love on Asgard.” You said with a watery smile. Steve’s hand gripped Thor’s bicep in shock. “I didn’t mean to, and it was stupid and irrational, but I did. Had I not fallen for Phil, seeing you again would’ve been phenomenal but…”  
“I was too late.”   
“You were too late.”

“When you took him from me, I was angry and distraught and confused. I wanted to hate you but it was hard and it hurt. I felt betrayed. But now…”   
“Now?” Loki asked, a little more eager than he would like to be.

“Now I think I’m falling all over again.”

Loki closed the distance between you and placed his hands on either side of your face. He wiped away your tears and let a grateful smile crinkle his face. You placed a hand over his and leaned into his touch. There it was again, Loki realised. The spark. It was back; _he_ was back.

“Can… Can I kiss you?” He asked, stroking the sides of your face with his thumbs. Steve hopped forward.   
“Hey, woah. I think I’ve got something to say about that.” He chuckled nervously.   
“Quiet Captain.” You whispered, raising yourself onto the balls of your feet. Loki’s lips dusted over yours timidly before meeting them. He held your head in his hands as he kissed you, mouth moving wonderfully against your own. You felt all of your breath leave you and pulled Loki closer by his hips.

“Where is Mister Stark? I should imagine his reaction to be quite amusing.” Thor leaned in to whisper to Steve (who was watching the encounter with equal apprehension and concern).   
“He was teaching at Xavier’s last I heard. Probably fell asleep in his office…”

Loki felt your fingers creep onto his clothes and tug him closer. In that moment, the world became silent and empty and pure. Loki kissed you and time stood still.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> One final chapter still to come...


	13. Fate

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That’s all folks… ;-; I absolutely adored this story and now I’m upset because it’s over. If you, like me, would like to have a little cry whilst reading this chapter, listen to ‘Til Kingdom Come by Coldplay after the line: ‘was it ever going to be anyone else?’. It’s such a pretty song and it works so well with this story. Thank you my darlings, for reading this story, and I hope you enjoy the conclusion to one of my favourite things that I've written - ‘Stolen’.

“I’ll be nice, I suppose.” Clint murmured, though his balled fists didn’t particularly convince you. Clint had woken up bright and early that morning, and begun his ritual hunt for coffee. However, upon entering the kitchen, he stumbled upon what appeared to be some sort of intervention. Loki and you sat beside each other at the table whilst Thor stood nearby with his arms folded.  Steve was leaning casually against a kitchen countertop. You’d ensured that Barton sat down for your confession and you were beginning to wonder whether it had been necessary.  
“You mean… you’re not upset?” You asked hesitantly.  
“Hm? Oh no, I’m livid. But I said that I’ll be nice, so he gets a 5 second head start before I grab my bow and put an arrow through his skull.”

Thor and Steve leapt forward, pinning Clint to the ground. The archer’s lungs burned as he yelled expletives at the fleeing Loki, though the fact that Steve was sitting on him might have contributed also.  
“Clint, please-”  
“Did he brainwash you? Did he use that stick thingy on you?”

“It’s a sceptre.” Thor grunted as Clint’s elbow collided with his jaw. “And no, he did not. We were there, Barton. It is true, now calm yourself.”

Thor’s words seemed to do some good and slowly your friend stopped writhing. Cautiously, Steve rolled off of him, and Thor helped him to his feet. Clint dusted himself off – and bolted out of the room after Loki.  
“ _You son of a bitch!_ ” You heard him scream as he disappeared. Thor rolled his eyes and began the chase.

Tony pressed himself against the doorframe to let the exiting Asgardian past. He looked positively exhausted.  
“What’s up with Katniss?” He chuckled, adjusting the bag strap on his shoulder. On any other day, Stark’s clothing might have looked smart and suitable for teaching. He was wearing a dress-shirt underneath a brown jumper, and these accompanied a pair of old jeans. However, the jumper was incredibly wrinkled and ruffled, the shirt collar was askew, and his jeans were riding a little low; had he forgotten to wear a belt? Teaching supplies (and what appeared to be a couple of blueprints) spilled out of his leather satchel, but he dropped the bag onto the floor casually before stretching.

“Hunger Games might not be a bad analogy…” You sighed, scratching the back of your neck. Steve looked a little lost but you elaborated anyway. “Clint’s going to murder Loki.”  
“Gotta give him some credit, he’s exercised a lot of restraint up until now. What pushed him over the edge?”  
“Well, you might as well know – Loki and I, uh.. Well, we uh...”

Steve placed a hand on your shoulder.  
“They’re in love.” He said. You laughed airily and felt heat rising to your cheeks. Tony looked momentarily taken aback. He shook his head and folded his arms.  
“Woah… That’s heavy.”  
“You gonna be okay? Or should I expect you to be suiting up in the next few minutes too?”

Tony chuckled.  
“No, no. It’s okay. Well, it’s not _really_ okay but I’ll deal with it. Besides, I certainly can’t judge.” He said, clearing his throat and standing a little taller. “You’ve been honest with me, it’s time you knew. Whilst teaching at Xavier’s-”  
“You’ve been banging the mutant kid, John. We know. We all know.” You muttered, rolling your eyes and strutting past him, hoping to find Loki before Clint did.

Tony watched you leave with an open mouth.  
“How- How did she know? How did any of you know?” He stammered. Steve hummed amusedly and patted Tony on the back.  
“You might want to wear shirts with high-collars for a bit. When you see the kid this afternoon, tell him not to suck too hard.”  
“What makes you think I’m seeing him later?”

Steve laughed and wandered out of the room.  
“You’re missing a sock and your belt is gone. I’m assuming you’ll want them back…” His fading voice could be heard saying.  
“If I didn’t know better Captain,” Tony replied, “I’d say you knew what to look for.” But Steve was too far away to hear.

* * *

Loki ducked into the alleyway and bent over, panting. He clutched his chest and peered out onto the open street in search of his pursuer. Clear. For now, he had time to catch his breath. He groaned and leaned his head back against the brick of the building behind him. He knew that Barton was going to be angry but he hadn’t expected to be hunted like an animal. He hoped that a few hours would give him time to cool off, or at least time for Thor to catch him.  
“You know…” A voice from the end of the alleyway said. Loki turned but saw only shadows. “They say that too much jogging can be bad for you, that it can have adverse effects on the body.”

The man in the suit stepped forward, where Loki could see him, and smirked.  
“It could even kill you.”

Loki stared at Phil Coulson, disbelieving. He was wearing a suit and tie, and stood casually with his hands in his pockets. He looked calm and content. Phil removed his hands from his pockets and held them up, placating.  
“I know I’m not quite as dead as I’m supposed to be.” He said, moving closer. “But I had a few things I still needed to do. Dying at that moment would’ve been… inconvenient.”

“Of course,” said Loki. “Though I’m curious as to how you survived…”  
“Technically, I didn’t.” Phil smirked, leaning against the wall on the opposite side of the alley. For a man who had cheated death, he looked severely composed. “Legally dead for the best part of a minute; but I’m a stubborn bastard and it takes a lot more than a big stick to knock me down. Even if it is shiny and alien. All it took was a vacation and I was as good as new. Ever been to Tahiti? It’s a magical place.”

Loki looked out onto the street and ground his teeth. Part of him wanted Barton to arrive so that the conversation would cease.  
“How’s (y/n)?” Phil asked with a low and quiet voice. Loki kept his head turned. He didn’t want to answer – the dialogue was veering in a direction that he very much wanted to avoid.  
“She’s... moved on.”

“Good. I’d hoped so. I don’t want her to be alone.”    
“Then why not return? Why let your death be thought real?”  
“Because I can’t bring myself to. If I were to turn up now… it just might break her and I’d never do that.” Loki remained silent, watching his opponent with narrow eyes and an incredulous stare. “She can never know that I survived. I couldn’t bear to think of her hating me that way…”

Loki paused, attempting to comprehend Phil Coulson’s logic. He sighed reluctantly.  
“I won’t tell her.”  
“Good,” Phil nodded, standing up straight again and adjusting the sleeves on his jacket, “because I can’t believe I’m saying this - but I’m trusting you.”  
“To keep your secret?”  
“To take care of her.”  
“I intended to do that regardless of your intervention.” Loki said scornfully. Coulson raised an eyebrow and stepped forward, barely 30cm from the Asgardian.  
“ _Nonetheless_. You should know that if you don’t, I will hunt you down and personally kick your ass.”

After leaving a pause, Phil receded and ventured back towards the shadows. Loki smirked before turning to watch the man in the suit leave – until something dawned upon him, and he called out to the back of Phil’s head.  
“I told you she’d moved on – I never said that it was with me.” Phil stopped in his tracks and looked over his shoulder. He smiled.  
“Was it ever going to be anyone else?”

* * *

 

Loki was true to his word and spent the journey back to the Tower formulating ideas. His best one could potentially be the worst. He pondered it several times over before deciding to return, and even then he was unsure. The sight of a disgruntled Clint pinned to the sofa by Mjolnir greeted him. Tony was showing you pictures on his phone, of the mutant boy, Pyro, judging by his enthusiastic expression, whilst Steve and Thor chatted over a coffee.

Your eyes lit up when Loki entered the room and you seemed all too glad to get away from Tony’s slideshow. However, you were quick to perceive that there was something wrong the minute you got near – “you might be an Asgardian, but worry looks the same in every man’s eyes.” This was it. The big reveal. His master plan.

You stood outside the tower and adjusted the straps on your backpack. It was perhaps one of the heaviest cases you’d ever packed and as a result you were leaving it on the pavement until the absolute last minute. You might break your back if you tried to carry it for too long. Once you were happy, you stood up and, with a resigned sigh, looked at the people in front of you: a line of strangers you’d been lucky enough to call friends. The first, a billionaire whose arrogantly large home he’d shared with you. The second, a man who’d persistently woken you up at the crack of dawn and convinced you to beat the crap out of him. And finally, the man who started it all.

You threw your arms around Tony and felt him laugh heartily, before returning the hug.  
“Tell Pyro he’s a lucky guy.” You said, with a tremble in your voice.  
“If he doesn’t know it based on what we did last night then-”  
“You’re making this really hard to be an emotional goodbye, you know?” You laughed as you left his side.

Clint looked to be feeling a mixture of resentment and sadness. He gathered you into his arms and buried his face into your neck.  
“You call me, ya hear? 1 in the morning, 1 at night: I don’t care. You call.”  
“I don’t know how to tell you this, Clint, but I don’t think they have phones in Asgard.”  
“Send a damn carrier pigeon then. Or a paper aeroplane or some shit.”  
“I’m going to miss you so much.”

Clint seemed reluctant to let you go, but ultimately you prised yourself from his arms and turned to Steve. He looked positively forlorn.  
“You should be saying goodbye to Thor, not me.” You sniffed, trying to smile and not throw yourself at your friend.  
“W-why would I do that?” He stammered and you looked at your feet with a smile, brushing a piece of hair behind your ear.  
“You don’t live here.”

“What’s your point?” Steve asked, after failing to find the correlation between your two statements. You placed a hand behind his neck and pulled him into a tender hug. Whilst there, you turned and whispered into his ear.  
“You don’t live here – but you were still in the tower at 4 in the morning. In your pyjamas. With messy hair.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek before continuing. “You both heard raised voices and arrived at the same time. That’s not a coincidence, and I’m not an idiot.”

You pulled away and watched crimson dust Steve’s face. You placed a hand on his cheek and stroked his temple with your thumb.  
“You once told me, ‘hold onto the good things, and you’ll forget everything else.’ Hold onto him, Steve. He’s good for you.”

Loki watched you say your goodbyes. Thor placed an arm around your head and pulled it down, ruffling your hair and making you laugh. When you escaped his grasp, you attempted to flee but he wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you into a tight hug.

The sight helped the younger Odinson feel more and more assured of his decision. He couldn’t protect you here. The ground was foreign and strange, and the culture even more so; unlike Thor he knew that he would never be able to adjust. There was too much that went wrong for him here. Asgard was a much better choice. At the same time, it would allow Phil’s secret to be kept without fear of you running into him of your own accord. That was what Loki was telling himself at least. In reality, he knew that he was secretly afraid you would abandon him if you ever learned that Coulson had survived.

No matter the reason he’d told you, surprisingly you’d been happy to join him. Loki had explained everything, trying to be sympathetic to the fact that you’d be leaving everything behind – but you’d only been supportive.  
“Asgard is where it all began, I suppose. It’s only fitting that we go back. Besides, part of me wants to see what your dad thinks about us. It might just kill him… I probably shouldn’t be so pleased about that.”

The trip there was better than you had expected, even if you felt as though you wanted to throw up the minute you arrived. You’d never been a good flier; not even transatlantic, let alone interplanetary. Your knees buckled and you let your backpack sink to the floor, collapsing next to it on your hands and knees. After a minute you clutched your stomach and groaned.  
“Bloody hell…”

Loki lowered himself down too and stroked the back of your head.  
“I’ll take your things and let you get your bearings. Heimdall will watch you whilst I am gone.” He whispered, pressing a gentle kiss to the side of your head.  
“Who the hell is–Holy Mother Mary!” You exclaimed as you looked up at the man in front of you.  
“The pleasure is mine…” He replied warmly.

Loki hurried away with your backpack, mumbling about his return and left you in the presence of the man draped in gold. His golden eyes watched you, sword in hand, and he gave a small smile.  
“You’re… You’re the guy.”  
“Yes, I am, as you said… ‘the guy’.”

“No, I mean,” you panted, trying to ignore the feeling of nausea that was pooling in your stomach. “the _guy_. When I was here the first time. You brought me.”  
“That is correct.”  
“So that means you’re the guy-”  
“We have established that.”  
“No, I meant, you’re the guy that can see everything.”

“Almost everything. But mostly, yes. I am partially omniscient.”  
“So then… why?” You said, getting up onto your shaky legs. “Why did you bring me here… for _Thor_? Surely you knew what would happen?”  
“I did.”  
“Alright…” You murmured, wondering whether to press further. “But then you must’ve seen what would happen to Loki too? The things he did! Why didn’t you try to stop him, to save him?”

Heimdall sighed and abandoned his post, descending to your side. He looked far less intimidating by your side. Almost friendly. He placed his hands on your shoulders and pivoted you to the direction from whence you came. You gasped, seeing a spattering of stars thrown against a blush-coloured canvas.  
“That is not my purpose.”  
“Your purpose?”

“Quite. I am not entitled to intervene with the events that I observe. That is true power. My purpose is to be a silent witness, an equitable friend to the universe, a watcher. But you... Your name, my lady, is written in the stars. Spread across the galaxies, and all of it saying the same thing. You are Loki’s salvation. The one destined to raise him up when he falls. The one to stoke him from the ashes of his own self-destruction. Had I not selected you from the other women in these 9 realms, you would not have met. But I couldn’t interfere further than that. I had to let him make mistakes, become broken, so that you could fix him. Had I had done more, then he would’ve suspected you and I. In order for you to truly come together, you had to do so of your own accord.”

You looked away from Heimdall and glanced back at the galaxy. It was stunning and beautiful and… misleading. Was everything in your life written in the stars? Penned by the fates? Did anything you do make a difference?  
“You are wondering about the purpose of your existence.” Heimdall mused with delight laden in his voice. “I often wonder the same thing. Do I truly see everything? Or singular eventualities?”

He paused and turned to watch you, teary eyes fixated on the firefly-sky in front of you. Your home was out there somewhere…  
“And do you know what I realised?” You tore your eyes away and looked up at him.

“It doesn’t matter.”                                  

“So long as we live with the intention of loving and laughing and sharing all we know with people who matter – what does it matter how that came to fruition? I know that I should care not whether my happiness was bestowed upon me of my own accord or gifted to me by a God.”  
“Isn’t that basically admitting that ignorance is bliss?” You smirked, despite knowing that he was probably right.

Heimdall hummed amusedly.  
“It is only my interpretation. _You_ should decide how you choose to react. And you will”

In that moment, you saw everything through Heimdall’s eyes – the stars, the suns, the countless lives linked to both. His eyes were heavy with all they could see and made all of your insecurities seem insignificant. He had helped you realise that you needn’t be anxious about the bigger picture. It was only ever going to be too big, too complex for you. What you could do was live life day by day, make the little choices and cherish them. Maybe you were pre-destined to go somewhere, but it didn’t matter why. As long as it was somewhere good.

And Asgard looked pretty good right now.


End file.
